It would be great if Jin Yan was not Jin Yan.

For some reason, such an idea suddenly appeared in Bai Hao's mind.

He doesn't need Jin Yan to understand or forgive him. He just hopes that Jin Yan hates him, hates him, and is guarded against him, rather than laughing at him like nothing has happened, listening to his words, and asking for it.

Before finding Jin Yan, he also thought a lot about how to apologize, explain, and confess. Even if he copied everything that Jin Yan had suffered on him, he was willing to do so.

But he thought about it all, but never thought that when they met, Jin Yan would say sorry to him in panic, I was not dead.

Whenever Bai Hao thought of this, he felt that he should be cut into pieces. But he also knew that he was really cut into pieces. There was a fool who would be even more sad than him.

So if Jin Yan is not Jin Yan, you can watch his pain and misfortune coldly, and curse him will have more retribution and allow him to receive more punishment.

Bai Hao raised his hand and slowly covered the back of Jin Yan's hand, clasping his fingertips bit by bit until they touched the other person's palm.

He suddenly felt a little lucky. Fortunately, Jin Yan covered his eyes. Otherwise, when he saw him crying, he would not know what strange words this drunkard would spit out.

"Jin Yan..." Bai Hao spoke gently, then held his hand and slowly lowered it.

Jin Yan looked at him, his eyes were not very clear, and his face was a little puzzled, but he did not move around and obediently asked Bai Hao to put down his hand.

Bai Hao leaned closer to him, pressed against his forehead, with a smile on his face, but his voice was even more hoarse: "Young Master is also very happy to see you."

He knew that Jin Yan had never forgotten the past, otherwise he would not want to leave, would not hide from his own patience of pain, and would not act so uneasy after being drunk... But he couldn't let Jin Yan go.

What Li Shuyi said may be correct, but he couldn't do it. Even Jin Yan had dinner with others tonight, and the few hours he was not by his side, he felt as if he had lost his soul, not knowing where he was going or what he was going to do. What kind of relationship he had for Jin Yan was no longer important, because no matter what kind of relationship he had, they would be together for the rest of their lives.

Bai Hao hugged Jin Yan in his arms, his tone seemed particularly gentle: "Do you like me?"

Jin Yan's mind was covered in mud, his chin rested on Bai Hao's shoulders, and his eyes were fixed on the coffee table on the carpet. He didn't know who was talking to him, and asked confusedly: "Who do you like?"

The low and nice voice seemed to be luring: "I like Bai Hao."

The chandelier on the ceiling is reflected on the glass coffee table, and a vague halo in front of me is sometimes bigger and sometimes smaller, as if it is hypnotizing.

Jin Yan's eyelids were slightly lowered, and holding his arms was so warm. He relaxed his body, leaned his head to the skin on Bai Hao's neck, and muttered in a low voice: "I like the young master the most."

As soon as the sound fell, people fell asleep.

He slept too early.

If it were a few minutes later, maybe I could still notice that someone lowered his head and put a gentle kiss on his lips.

After the Chinese New Year, Xiao Xinghua is back.

He read Li Shuyi's medical records and all the examination results, and then held a general practice seminar to put the surgery on the agenda.

On the day of the preoperative conversation, Li Shuyi asked to participate in the whole process, so it was conducted in his ward.

Xiao Xinghua told them that Li Shuyi's condition was not too bad, but it was not optimistic. Although the tumor was benign, it was located at the base of the left skull, and the lesions were low and deep. Because the left nerve was richer than the right side, the risk and difficulty of surgery were high. In addition, Li Shuyi had been injured before and had not stopped all kinds of injuries in the past six months, and he did it again, so his physical foundation was not good.

"No doctor can guarantee that the brain surgery will be 100% successful. Even if the surgery is successful, many patients have serious sequelae. So no matter what, you must be mentally prepared."

After Xiao Xinghua said this, Li Shuyi's expression remained unchanged. Bai Jing next to him frowned, and Jin Yan was so scared that he clenched the corner of Bai Hao's clothes.

"You have to rest well these days. You will have blood tests and antibiotic skin tests the day before the operation. In order to avoid infection during the operation, you also need to shave your hair." Xiao Xinghua told Li Shuyi, "You must fast eight hours before the operation, but don't worry, a nurse will remind you at that time."

Li Shuyi nodded: "Thank you, Dr. Xiao."

Bai Jing sent Xiao Xinghua away. As soon as the person left, Li Shuyi immediately turned his head and said to Jin Yan: "I warn you, if you dare to shave your hair, you should never appear in front of me again." When he just talked about shaving his head, he glanced at Jin Yan's expression that seemed to have made up some major decision, and he knew what this idiot was thinking.

Jin Yan showed horror on his face. For some reason, he didn't say a word, and Uncle Li knew what he was going to do.

Li Shuyi turned to Bai Hao: "You should stare at him well and don't make him stupid."

Bai Jing sent the person away, probably because there was something else and he didn't come back. Li Shuyi happened to want to stay by himself for a while, and regardless of Jin Yan's expression of crying or not, he drove the two of them away.

In fact, his illness is serious or not, and he doesn't care at all. He just wants to take advantage of the fact that no one is disturbing him now and recall his recent days and make up his troubled thoughts.

Li Shuyi knew that since Bai Jing found him, he had been overreacting. Whenever Bai Jing spoke, he would sarcastically stop him, sometimes even like a hysterical resentful woman. Thinking about it now, Tiningyue said that Xie Ming gave him to Bai Jing was ultimately because he couldn't let go, and he just cared about Bai Jing's past.

He pulled himself away and looked at him objectively, and suddenly found in a mess that he was himself who had been reluctant to forgive him, and that person who was truly calm was Bai Jing.

Li Shuyi smiled bitterly. This seemed to be a vicious cycle that could not stop no matter what. He always pressed him step by step, while Bai Jingze completed his plan step by step without any influence.

Bai Jing had said more than once that they were not suitable for both of them. It was because he had been unable to put his position right, so he ended up like this now.

At night, Bai Jing took the things prepared for Li Shuyi and went to his ward as usual.

When I entered, I saw Li Shuyi wearing a white sick gown, leaning against the window, her forehead against the window, her eyes drooping, and I don’t know what she was looking at.

The heart suddenly stinged.

When he sent Xiao Xinghua out today, Xiao Xinghua told him that they had contacted Li Shuyi and found that his attitude was very negative. He hoped that Bai Jing could communicate well with him and change his mindset. Otherwise, if he didn't even want to survive, what's the use of a doctor who is awesome?

Bai Jing stood at the door and didn't dare to go over for a moment.

When Li Shuyi heard the sound, he slowly raised his head and looked at him.

The ward was so quiet that I couldn't even hear the sound of breathing. Time passed by little, and neither of them spoke, but their intertwined eyes gradually brought heat.

Bai Jing opened his mouth first: "Don't lean against the window, it's cold."

He thought Li Shuyi would sting him a few words as usual, or take his words as wind in his ears, but he didn't expect that the man actually left the window, took off his shoes, and sat on the hospital bed.

Bai Jing was a little surprised. Li Shuyi looked at him and patted the seat beside him, with a gentle voice: "Come here and sit down."

Bai Jing didn't know what was wrong with him, but he walked over as he said, put down the box in his hand, took the coat hanging by the bed and put it on his back, and then sat down.

Li Shuyi let his movements, his eyes fell on the box and asked, "What is this?"

Bai Jing leaned over and took the box and put it in Li Shuyi's hand: "Open it and take a look."

Li Shuyi frowned slightly. The box was a little bigger than his palm and was not heavy when he held it. I don’t know what it was installed.

He looked at Bai Jing in confusion again, and then opened the box.

The first thing that caught my eye was a lady's hairpin. The style was very old. It had a black bottom and a tacky rose in the middle. There were not many diamonds on it, and there was even a little rust on the bottom.

Li Shuyi was stunned, and after a while he came to his senses, he took out the hairpin, stroked it over and over again, and his fingertips trembled slightly.

"Do you know," he suddenly spoke, and as he spoke, he looked nostalgic on his face. "When she was carrying me on her back, I always stared at the hairpin behind, counting the diamonds inlaid, one, two... and counting, we got home." He smiled, "Later I grew taller than her, and she was wearing this hairpin. I asked her why she didn't buy a new one, and she said she would wait for me to grow up to buy it for her."

"Wait until I grow up, wait until I grow up..." Li Shuyi murmured and lost her mind.

Bai Jing knew that he was sad and didn't want him to think further. He took out the slightly yellowed photos from the bottom of the box and handed them to him and said, "You never smiled when you were a child."

Upon hearing this, Li Shuyi put down the card and took the photo.

After the accident at home, Zhao Hui took away all Li Wenying's belongings and kept nothing for him. He didn't know that he and his aunt still had so many photos.

Li Shuyi looked at the various self in the photo and found that he really didn't like to laugh when he was a child. Even though he was celebrating his birthday, he had a small red dot on his forehead and a cream on his cheeks, but still stared at the front with a serious face, forming a sharp contrast with Li Wenying bent beside him.

Li Shuyi was infected by his aunt and couldn't help but smile and said, "No wonder people say they think they are old at the age of three."

He took the photo and looked carefully for a long time before he raised his head and asked Bai Jing, "Did you tell Uncle Zhao about my illness?"

Bai Jing replied in a deep voice: "No, these are what he wants me to give you."

Li Shuyi nodded. He believed that no matter how Bai Jing was, he still had this measure, so he would not ask.

He touched the hairpin again, put away all the things, and then pondered for a while, saying, "I should thank you, but I will not say this."

Bai Jingxin raised it up and waited for the words behind him.

"We two, let go of the love and love, and ignore who is right and who is wrong, and who is even more sorry for whom. Have we known each other for so many years, are we still friends?"

Bai Jing didn't understand what these words meant. How could the two of them "abandon those loves and loves"? Li Shuyi couldn't throw them away, and he couldn't throw them away. But he still answered "Yes" according to Li Shuyi's words.

Li Shuyi said: "Then I will help me as my friend for more than ten years."

Bai Jing looked at his brighter eyes under the light, suppressed the urge to reach out to touch him, nodded and said, "You said."

Li Shuyi's expression suddenly became serious: "If I die, don't erect a monument for me and scatter my ashes into the sea."

"Li Shuyi!" Bai Jing changed his face in an instant, and his low voice seemed to have dropped the room temperature by several degrees.

"Listen to me," Li Shuyi frowned and continued, "Another thing, when I was in the sanatorium, I found someone to be a surrogate through Yitian. If I die and the child is born in the future, you can help me find a better family to take care of him."

This is what Li Shuyi regrets the most now. He used to know that he was sick, but he waited for death regardless of his carelessness. While committing suicide, he felt guilty and uneasy. Later, when he met Mu Ran, he somehow wanted to keep the blood of the Li family, trying to relieve his guilt in this way.

As a result, the guilt was not relieved at all and he left me a big trouble.

Bai Jing's heart sank. He didn't expect Li Shuyi to do surrogacy, but he also realized that Li Shuyi really didn't want to live. Otherwise, he would want the child and he could have it together when he was surrogate himself. There was no need to wait until later and find such a sustenance in panic.

"I originally wanted to hand over these things to Jin Yan, but the child was in poor health and I didn't want him to be sad, so..."

"If you don't want him to be sad, do you want me to be sad?" Bai Jing suppressed the fire in his heart and gritted his teeth. Li Shuyi actually explained the funeral with a formal attitude towards him. Is this what I should have as a friend after leaving love?

Li Shuyi was a little impatient and sad. If he really died, the benefits of dialogue must outweigh the disadvantages. What's so sad?

"No matter whether I admit it myself or not, or whether you want it or not, the person closest to me in this world is you. If I hand over these things to others, there will always be various concerns and inappropriate things. After thinking about it, I can only hand it over to you." Li Shuyi paused and said, "You only tell me, do you help or not?"

Bai Jing pursed his lips and said coldly: "Neither of these situations can happen."

Li Shuyi was helpless: "I'm just planning the worst."

Bai Jing turned his head and ignored him and did not speak.

Li Shuyi stared at him, her eyes slowly slid from the corner of his eyes over the outline of her side face, and finally fell on the corner of her mouth.

After he came back, he was only concerned about getting angry and quarreling. He hadn't looked at Bai Jing well for a long time. Even if this person is tense now and looks like a cold and hard stone, he will still be unable to control his palpitations when he looks at him.

Li Shuyi smiled slightly, tilted her head and said, "Why don't I give you a gift?"
To be continued...