How many days has it been...?

I looked at the scratches on the wall and couldn't help but smile bitterly.

Twenty days.

I've been stuck here for twenty days!!

During these three weeks, I could only get a bottle of mineral water and a bag of bread every day.

Due to a serious nutritional imbalance, my whole body began to lose strength.

In this midsummer season, I was locked in an extremely hot and stuffy hut. There was no suitable place for me to relieve myself, so the stench filled the house.

Countless maggots and flies were wandering around the house, and countless cockroaches were crawling all over the walls.

It's so funny... The current situation really makes me want to laugh.

I, a person who usually doesn’t even have dust in my house, now live with cockroaches all day long.

In the first few days, I ran around to avoid them, but the area here was so small that I couldn't get around them no matter what.

I can only let them crawl all over my body.

Cockroaches are soft and cool to the touch. When they crawl over your arms, they itch, and you can't even feel their slight weight.

I'm really afraid of this kind of thing, but I can't avoid it. Every day I can feel goosebumps all over my body, but I know that when I sleep, they will also lean on me, thin

Stroking his forelimbs.

They talk to me at night, use my body to keep me warm, and I can pull cockroaches out of my hair at will.

In this dark and small room, I don’t have any hygiene products, only bugs...only countless bugs...

But who am I?

Am I the Zhang Laidi who cooked for the whole family when she came home from school every day when I was seven years old, or the Zhang Chenze who when I was thirty-three years old, was escorted to and from major companies by car?

I have two completely opposite lives. Isn't this normal?

Some part of it must be a dream, right?

Yes, I must be hysterical.

If I had to choose now...I would be Zhang Laidi.

I don't want to die.

I lost, I really gave up.

There is no law in these people's eyes. If I still don't agree to him, he will definitely let me starve to death here.

If I don't Zhang Laidi, then I can only be a corpse.

I'm a human being...I'm not a pig. I shouldn't be locked up in a small room every day, eating, drinking, and eating.

I want to stand up, I want to shake the bugs off my body, I want to put on cleaner clothes, I want to take a shower, and I want to eat a peach full of juice.

I want to be Zhang Laidi.

What kind of unattainable dream was I trying to achieve before?

I want to get out of here and start a new life.

The ten years in Chengdu were truly the most ridiculous dream in my life.

I was wrong, I never dare to do it again.

As long as it allows me to leave this room, I can agree to anything.

I am willing to be Mrs. Ma, I am willing to stay in the village, and I am willing to give birth to his children.

My life has been destined to be like this since I was born, but I have been struggling like a dream.

If you can completely escape these situations just through your own efforts, why are there so many miserable people in the world? This is unfair to them.

Now that I have woken up from my dream, it is time for me to return to my original life.

Cockroach friends...do you think what I said is right?

But that butcher, why didn't he come to me?

Didn’t you say that you only need to starve me for five days?

It’s been twenty days now!

Fortunately, I can distinguish between night and day in the house, and I can vaguely hear distant sounds, otherwise I would definitely go crazy.

What happened to the nearest village?

In the past few days, the sound of police cars could always be heard, and quarrels could also be heard vaguely, but it has become quiet these days.

But I didn't even have the strength to speak, and I couldn't even ask for help.

Who can come to save me?

It was not until night that the door to the house was finally opened.

This door opened for the second time in twenty days.

"What a fool..." Butcher Ma stood there angrily. He looked back and saw no one was around, then turned around and closed the door.

I gasped for breath, stretched out my hand, and wanted to say something, but found that my arms were starting to wither.

When did this happen...?

"What the hell are you doing in the city, you idiot?!" he asked in a panic, "So many policemen came here? I didn't dare to come here for several weeks..."

"Let me go..." I finally said two words, almost using up all my strength, "let me go..."

"Still letting you go?"

Only then did I see an oil lamp in his hand. He put the lamp aside and reached out to untie his belt.

I was in a daze, and for a moment I didn't know what he was doing.

"It's so troublesome to lock up a mother-in-law like you... It seems I can't wait for you to give in, I have to deal with you first."

Wait...wait a moment...

I finally reacted, but my thinking was extremely sluggish now. Everything I wanted to say was like cars colliding with each other in a car accident, and I couldn't say a word in my throat.

He slapped me down to the ground, stretched out his hand and started tearing my clothes off.

I don't have the strength to resist at all.

Can you let me say something?

I agree...I agree to everything, but don't touch me like this...

Please...

"Eh..." He took off my pants and showed a look of disdain, "You melon bitch... why are you dirtier than a pig?"

I am about to collapse. The dignity I have accumulated and the perseverance I have worked hard for so long are all falling apart at this moment.

How serious a sin did I commit that made my life so miserable?

What should I do?

At this time, I was like a corpse. No matter what this stinky man did to me, he couldn't move at all.

"Mother Gua..." Seeing that I didn't react at all, he stretched out his hand and swung it at my face.

I was slapped many times, and the taste of blood filled my mouth, but I didn't say a word.

It wasn't until he stopped floating on me that I shed tears.

This is my life.

This is the life I was destined to live from the day I was born.

It is said that on the day I was born, there were a total of six babies in the delivery room, five of which were boys.

My old man and my mother asked the doctor happily: "Which boy is our baby?"

When they found out that the only girl was their child, they turned around and left with cold faces. If the doctor hadn't stopped them, I would have lost my parents now.

"It's really exciting..."

Butcher Ma stood up and put on his pants. Just when I thought everything was going to be over, he gave me another head-on blow.

He took out his old cell phone from his pocket and started taking photos and videos of me from all angles.

Whether it is something that can be photographed or something that cannot be photographed.

Breaking the law... He broke the law again...

But wait... why should I care if he breaks the law?

This is my future life. I am not a lawyer, I am Zhang Laidi.

When I was the most helpless, desperate, and dirty, he carefully photographed me.

Now I can't even cover my face with my hands.
To be continued...