In the heavy snow, I took 3 hours to get from Yangzhou to Nantong. When I arrived at the hospital, Ye Huayi was still in the delivery room. Because he was the first child and Ye Huayi was weak in physical condition, the delivery time would be longer.

What surprised me was that among a large group of people waiting, I met Lin Xi whom I hadn't seen for a long time. She should have calculated Ye Huanyi's childbirth date and rushed back from Ireland in advance. I almost subconsciously looked at it. According to common sense, Chen Qingyi should have come back with Lin Xi. After all, they and Ye Huanyi are very good friends, so they will naturally come back on such an important day of having children.

What makes me regret is that I did not see Chen Qingyi.

......

After greeting everyone waiting, Lin Xi came to Pipi and me. Pipi happily hugged her legs. Lin Xi's sudden appearance was an unexpected surprise for him.

Lin Xi was also very happy to see Pipi, touching Pipi's head and asked, "Little thing, do you miss your mother Lin?"

"Of course I want it, I think it every day," Pipi replied without hesitation.

"So good...Mom Lin brought you a gift and put it in the hotel and will give it to you tomorrow,"

Pipi didn't care about the gifts and asked with anticipation: "Where is mom, is she back too?"

Lin Xi glanced at me before whispering to Pipi: "Your mother has something very important, so she didn't come back this time."

"Oh," Pipi responded, and anyone could see the disappointment in his heart.

......

The more you expect and wait, the longer you wait. Everyone is anxious and expectant, and they communicate from time to time, but I am the quietest, but this does not mean peace.

At this moment, I remembered Zuo Lan. She had the same experience as Ye Huayi now. However, as the father of the child, I failed to wait for her and Pipi. I wonder if she had many people like Ye Huayi at that time.

Maybe Zuo Lan was lonely and heartbroken that day... because the child's biological father was unable to wait by her side... Looking back now, this must be the most regrettable thing in my life.

I felt so upset that I thought of Zuo Lan's face and smile, and I really wanted to cry. God was unfair and shouldn't have deprived her of life like this. She was so strong and kind...

......

There is a small rooftop at the end of the delivery room corridor, which is a place to smoke. I walked up to the small rooftop alone and lit a cigarette for myself in the howling cold wind.

In fact, I didn’t want to smoke too much, but I was afraid that I would lose my composure in front of everyone. I could no longer control my tears. My heart was cramped because of myself and because of missing me, but people could not be resurrected... Only then did I realize that the most painful thing in the world is that it is not the most painful thing.

I held the guardrail on the rooftop with my hands and watched the snowflakes in front of me lost. How great would it be if the heavy snow in the sky could build a bridge of communication for us, who were separated by yin and yang. I hope she would blame me severely, because she had never done this before she died, but I owe her so much.

In fact, it is not terrible to owe someone. What is terrible is that you will never have the opportunity to compensate and atone for your sins, so you can only live your life in regrets and self-blame. Perhaps this is the heaviest punishment Zuo Lan gave me.

......

The door of the isolation rooftop and corridor was opened, and Lin Xi stood in front of me.

Her sudden arrival caught me off guard and hurriedly wiped away the tears from my face. No matter what, I shouldn't have offended this festive day with tears and sentimentality.

"You're crying,"

"No, it was the wind that blew the ashes into the eyes,"

Lin Xi shrugged and did not ask any further questions.

In fact, since I read the diary left by Lin Xi and faced her again, I could no longer be as calm as before, although Lin Xi didn't know that I had read her diary recording her life in the past few years.

"How are you doing there?" I asked Lin Xi, using this to hide some of my emotions.

Lin Xi nodded and said, "It's very good. The days in Ireland may be the least burdensome day in my life..."

"Is that true? Congratulations,"

Lin Xi smiled, but said meaningfully: "In fact, a person can change himself, learn to let go, learn to let go, and learn to let go. It will be really relaxed and much happier,"

"You did it, didn't you?"

Lin Xi nodded and asked me again: "It's a pity that you haven't done it yet, so you're smoking here alone,"

I have no words, I have tried hard to let go, so I want to take Pipi back to the small town, and from then on, I don’t care about the troubles of the world and live my life on my own, but I can’t do it in the end and fall into the emotional ties again.

"You can't let go, Qingyi can't let go, Angel can't let go, and even Sister Chen Man hasn't let go, so you are in such pain... I once struggled with similar pain, so I went to Highway 66 alone, not for the uninhibited freedom, but for a relief... Unfortunately, even after experiencing a long journey of more than 3,000 kilometers on Highway 66, I couldn't get relief... Until one day Qingyi told me that she fell in love with you, I really realized that leaving you is a complete relief... Because Qingyi will not be the only woman who falls in love with you, nor will it be the last one. The most terrifying thing is that you may not know who the woman you really love is,"

I stared at Lin Xi in a daze. What she said was right was not completely right. I don’t know where it is right, I don’t know where it is wrong, I don’t know what it is wrong, I’m a little numb.

"Yixi, have you read the diary I left behind?" Lin Xi suddenly asked me.

“Look,”

My answer surprised Lin Xi. She looked at me with a complicated expression for a long time before saying, "I used to be so unable to let go of you. At the wedding with others, I even hoped that you could take me away, but..." Lin Xi shook her head and didn't say anything more.

After a long time, Lin Xi asked again: "I know there is no if, but I still want to ask if...If...If you read the diary on the night I left, would you go to the wedding site to take me away?"

I was immersed in Lin Xi's if, if I read the diary that day and went to the wedding scene desperately, what would be the situation now?

Maybe I wouldn't go to work that day because I'm very likely to drive Lin Xi's car and I can't pick up Mo Han's handbag. If I hadn't known Mo Han, I wouldn't know An Qi by chance... Maybe I wouldn't work at Buick and chose to start a business with Lin Xi, then there wouldn't be Xi Luo, let alone the "Xi Luo" incident caused by negligence... Under the chain reaction, I wouldn't know Brother Luo, Han Feng, and I wouldn't go to that small town. Therefore, I met Ye Huayi and met Zuo Lan again...
Chapter completed!