At 8:30 a.m. on January 3, the world formed a shadow, snow fell again, the glass was covered with ice patterns, and the color looked dim and mysterious.
The horizon is the second circle. I think our culture is just a dominant idea to which a set of cities and institutions are attached. It's as if my world could be replaced and recede at any time. This original shape is everywhere. Facts moved because they were melted into regulations, and slowly closed. The space began to become crowded, and the light gradually dimmed. They were sparse and scattered, just like the midnight lights in Bucharest that I saw later.
I, Shen Nianjie, am so sensitive and passionate by nature. My hair is messed up by the wind. My jeans have faded. In this beauty’s room, I can smell the scent of vanilla, maybe jujube. There are two curved copper lamps with flat bottoms. There were miscellaneous things in the glassware bag: Kiehl lipstick, eye drops, Qinan rosary beads. At the same time, it exuded that charming and sexy smell. There was an HP Palion 15 computer on the back layer, and she touched it every day. Time is more than touching other people or things. I laughed out loud while talking to her about my coma. She said to me: "You were in coma for 10 hours." She looked at her watch and said, "Another 30 minutes."
My school beauty brother tilted his head and asked, "Xiao Ye," as if he was pretending to be absent-minded. "How long have we known each other?" I said, "5 years!"
"I think, I am in it," I put my hand down from her arm and let her go, "I will continue to be independent. Everything between you and me."
"Ah," she calmly pointed her ring finger at me, "it seems that something did happen between you and Yan Zhifei." "However, now she has fallen in love with Xiyue!"
"It's nothing, me too." I faced her again, my eyes dimming, "There's something." "How can you be far away and so close at the same time?" "It's very strange. When you feel When you are lonely or sad, you pick it up. If you think of me, I will know it and give you joy."
I said, "I think this means that I can just take things as they come, until I meet someone." "I didn't expect that this kind of emotion is completely different from what I have experienced before. I'm not sure what this means. I don't know. Do you want to know about it yourself?"
The knuckles of my left hand pressed against her chin, "I think my life is similar to yours." "We have always liked the smell of wild flowers and sea water." I looked at her silhouette floating on the window. I could clearly see the dim Female lines. She was taking off her coat. I drank the brandy and looked straight at it. I think sometimes, we will have a double love. I am moving them now. I will always remember the light of the original emotion.
I looked at her white back and said, "You are hanging around in front of me in your underwear. Do you think this is safe?"
Shen Nianjie picked up the drink, stirred the ice cubes in the cup and said, "This is a silk shirt." The light eyes under her eyebrows shone with every curve. "To a certain extent." "Yeah." "I like the word 'somewhat'." Her eyes gradually became misty.
My school belle brother suddenly hugged my neck and touched my lips with his fingertips. "I know." "I thought about it." "I didn't mention that you talked about your emotions with others."
I asked her: "What about other things?" "Shouldn't you cross your palms with silver coins?" However, she looked at the daffodils and said: "Or..." "We must remember that there are some things. It will flow in your blood. We are not always who we usually are." When Shen Nianjie put a hand on mine, "And..." "Yes," she curled up and stepped back, "except for this Nothing else." "I have never seen such a beautiful thing. You. Light. Music."
Her eyes suddenly became very clear. She smiled and took another sip of wine. She said, "But the rules often change. The boundaries between good and bad are sometimes blurred. In this case, you What will we do?”
I answered Shen Nianjie like this: "I know what things cannot be changed, what boundaries cannot be blurred or confused. I have feelings." "It's like the villages in western Hunan flashing past the car window, like toys made of dead tree bark. Reflecting longing. Silhouettes of people, heavy trains sliding slowly across the scene, messy old buildings blackened by the scorching steam locomotives, tiny plants growing on dilapidated balconies. And those unhappiness that have been forgotten, I don’t know, are still there in some distant corner. There is an it. It is so low and harmonious. It covers me just like me. I am almost transparent."
"Of course," a faint smile appeared on her face, "You can say that I blurred the boundaries." She raised a trembling hand to touch her hair. "Actually!" "I don't want to fall in love with anyone." "I rarely guess that you are so kind and unwilling to hurt her feelings." Seeing my expression, she laughed. She also told me: "Emotions will always be dark. There once was a novelist who was severely depressed and usually stayed in the hospital. In the sparsely populated outer suburbs of New York, I was really tired of using my left and right hands for masturbation, so I took a ride all the way to New York and found the phone number of a popular movie star (Elaine) in the yellow pages. He said, I am Serling who wrote "The Catcher in the Rye" Ge, I wanted to sleep with you. Then, he slept with that beautiful woman."
Her words made me think that as long as we can endure it, we would rather indulge in it than abandon the forms we have been accustomed to for the sake of mourning. Here, resistance first means weakness.
Therefore, I said to Shen Nianjie: "What I fear is the will and those illusory emotions." "Including you, we must walk on this road and cannot escape." "I can't just leave, my road. It's just the beginning." "We are always loyal, only this is real." Somewhat distant. Somewhat uneasy.
I am just looking for clues to break through the darkness from Isaiah Beth. It is as if I can touch the darkness of Benjamin's death, so deep, so unrelieved sadness and helplessness. I believe and doubt. I swing left and right. I see our Complacency and ugliness. Revealed inwards and subverted heavily, the opposite side of the soul flashed in shock underneath. Or I lost my alertness as "I". I suddenly became restrained, reserved and hesitant. I thought, one day "I" and When I meet, what can I bring out, only tears, and only silence to endure it. It rises and falls again.