Three hundred and twentieth eight chapters embarrassing
Sogu moved further in, sat on the edge of the bed towards Kirin, and lay down next to him.
The two looked at the ceiling.
The curtains of the floor-to-ceiling windows were not completely closed, and the light from the street passed through the gaps, shone into the room, and rippled on the ceiling.
"bell……"
"——When I feel sleepy, I will go back to sleep."
Zonggu pursed his lower lip, raised his head slightly, and pushed the pillow towards her.
"alright."
His head fell on the pillow again, and he turned over, facing away from her.
Asagiri Ling also turned over and pressed up from behind.
"We used to sleep together like this."
"Don't talk nonsense, I still remember it."
"After you fall asleep."
"..."
She put her hands on his waist, "You wake up sometimes, don't you."
"...At first, I thought Ling was scared because she was sleeping alone, so I just pretended I didn't notice."
When they were still in the children's welfare home, the two lived alone in the same room most of the time, with beds facing each other and only two or three meters between them. Occasionally, she got off her bed and squeezed into his bed, and he discovered
She will also pretend not to know until she goes back on her own.
"Do you still feel that way now?" she asked.
Zonggu shook his head, "Of course not."
"Then what do you think now?"
He didn't speak.
Asagiri Suzu didn't speak again for a while, she just caressed his body, making them closer to each other.
Silence is no match for the festival in the streets and cannot last long.
"I still remember what you said before."
"What?"
She said softly: "You said that no matter whether you choose Jingzi or Hongzi in the end, you will never let me leave."
Zongya also remembered it immediately.
Although this idea has not changed now, it took him a while before he responded: "Of course."
"Why?" she asked again.
"Because a bell is a... bell."
"Childhood sweetheart?"
"Um."
"What are childhood sweethearts?"
"Someone I grew up with...at least for me."
"Well." Her hand explored forward, found his hand, and held it with him, "Then what."
"Important people."
"Is it more important than lovers?"
"..."
Zong Gu was silent for a while, turned over and looked at her: "What do you want to say?"
"I want to know what you think of me."
Asagiri Ling stroked his cheek, "What kind of existence is the so-called childhood sweetheart to you?"
"...Childhood sweethearts are childhood sweethearts."
She put it another way: "To you, am I different from them?"
He knew very well who they were in her mouth, and also understood what their "labels" were at this time. "Everyone is different from others."
"I'm family?"
"We are family."
"Then in your family, which position do I occupy? Mother, sister, or wife?"
Zong Gu took a deep breath: "Ling..."
"Don't run away." She pressed his face, not allowing him to look away, "Answer me."
After a moment of silence, Zongya held her hand and said, "If it were just me and Suzu's family, then Suzu would be my wife."
Asagiri Suzu was very happy, but what she wanted to say did not end there.
"There is no need for such self-deceptive restrictions. It's just you and me now. Our words will not be heard by a third person. You only need to answer me: Are your feelings for me the same as for a lover?"
"..."
Is it because they have been together for too long and have become accustomed to each other's intimacy, or is it because he is deliberately ignoring it and using "childhood sweetheart" as an excuse to deceive himself and others?
When he realized that he wanted to avoid this question again, Soya already understood the answer.
"yes."
He likes her, the way a lover likes her.
"Me too." Chao Wuling leaned forward and kissed him on the lips.
Zong Gu looked at her, as silent as if he was exhausted.
She kissed the side of his face again, then stood up and kissed his forehead.
"Accepting yourself calmly will make you feel better."
"..."
Zonggu raised his eyes, sat up and looked at Kirin.
"Have you thought of an answer to this afternoon's question?"
He also sat up, "What's the problem?"
"What Miss Hanada said."
"Huatian...is there only one person who is worthy of my sincerity?"
"Um."
"Is it a bell?"
Chaogiri Ling shook his head, understanding that he still didn't realize the real problem.
She picked up the mobile phone placed on the bedside and handed it over: "Let her tell you the answer."
Although it was already late at night, Tsukuyomi was definitely not asleep at this time. Souya hesitated for a moment, but still sent him a message.
After receiving the inquiry, Tsukuyomi's reply was a phone call, and the person on the other end of the phone call was Hanada Natsuna.
"Sotani-kun?"
"Miss Hanada?...It's me."
"Sorry, sorry~" came her laughter from the other side, "I just said it casually, I didn't expect you to be troubled by this problem to this point... Ah, but although it was said casually, it was not said casually.
You're right, I'm pretty good at judging people."
"..."
Asagiri Suzu turned on the bedside lamp, and Sogu glanced at her without telling her that there was someone else who really cared about this matter.
"So, what's the answer?"
"Sotani-kun, do you really not understand?" Hanada Natsuna asked.
"I don't understand, so I hope Miss Hanada can tell me directly."
"I can't blame you." The other person laughed again, "'Unawareness' can be said to be a label for people like Sotani-kun."
"..."
Zonggu frowned.
Through the microphone, Huatian Xiacai seemed to be able to see his impatience and stopped talking in circles:
"Okay, let's reveal the answer - for Soya-kun, the only person worthy of your sincerity is yourself."
Zonggu's lips moved but he didn't speak.
"Although I have only met once, I can tell that Sotani-kun is the kind of person who cares about his image. Do you mind if I make a random guess?"
Without waiting for his answer, she continued.
"Sotani-kun is tall and handsome. I heard from Tsukuyomi that your grades in school are also very good, and you are always surrounded by many girls. This is probably how it feels when you are surrounded by stars."
"But Sotani-kun is not interested in them. Tsukuyomi said that Sotani-kun grew up in a children's welfare home, so I guess something happened to make you a little repulsive to the people around you... Of course, also
Maybe I just don't like it, this is just my unfounded guess."
"That's a long way to go. In short, no one doesn't like other people's praise for themselves. Soya-kun is so popular, and he must have received much more praise than others.
Because Sotani-kun is really excellent, Sotani-kun will unconsciously take some exaggerated praise seriously. And the result of this is that even if there is a gap, Sotani-kun will try to get himself closer in that direction.
Over time, Sotani-kun, who is being sought after, cares more about his own external image than the people who pursue him... Well, I think there should be the expectations of someone very important to Sotani-kun, such as a certain person.
Like a teacher you like very much. If the pursuit of ordinary people makes Sotani-kun care more about his appearance, the expectations from important people will make Sotani-kun mentally burdened with too much sense of morality and responsibility...'
For the sake of the teacher, I have to be a good boy,' something like that, Souya-kun must have thought this way, right?"
"Ah, I'm sorry, I said something too far when I wasn't paying attention. In short, when a person's eyes always fall on himself and there is no one better than himself around, it is already obvious what will happen, right?"
Huatian Xiacai paused and said the obvious final conclusion:
"In other words, the person Soya-kun really cares about and likes the most is actually himself - in other words, he is narcissistic."
"..."
"By the way, narcissism and liking others are not contradictory. Don't use this to refute me."
"..."
"Is my guess right, Sotani-kun?"
Soya, who had been silent for a long time, finally spoke again: "Unfortunately, these are Miss Hanada's self-righteous thoughts."
"Hahaha--"
Flower field Xiacai laughs.
"I understand, I understand - it feels embarrassing to be directly exposed by someone you have only met once. Don't take it too seriously, young people are just..."
"——Sorry, I'm going to bed. Goodbye."
Before she could respond, Zonggu hung up the phone.
"Well, I died...did I say too much?"
Hanada Xiacai put down her phone and looked at the screen again, realizing that she had indeed spent a lot of time talking.
He returned the phone to Tsukuyomi, who had been silent. He was staring at the monitor in front of him, pressing the handle with his hand.
Although his main attention was focused on the game, he also heard the conversation between the two clearly and missed nothing.
"It's over, you must have made him angry... maybe it will all be blamed on me by then."
She laughed and said, "What are you afraid of?"
He didn't look away, "I'm afraid he won't let me go home and won't give me food to eat."
Huatian Xiacai moved closer and hugged his neck from behind, "What does this mean? Just stay here with me."
Tsukuyomi was silent for a few seconds, and as soon as his attention was distracted, he was chopped down by a knight holding a giant axe.
【YOU DIED】
He put down the controller and took a long breath, "No."
"Why?"
She caressed his body, "Didn't you say you like me very much? It just so happens that I also like you very much now. I'll buy you whatever you want."
Although extremely moved, Tsukuyomi still shook his head.
"All right."
Huatian Xiacai didn't force it, "At least stay with me these few days."
"Um……"
"Now take a bath with me first." She stood up. Tsukuyomi looked at the black and white screen, put down the controller and stood up.
Hanada Xiacai walked to the bathroom and said: "Your clothes are too old-fashioned. Did you find them in grandma's closet? Go to my closet and pick out something later. I'll do it again tomorrow morning.
Taking you to a shopping mall in Tokyo...what happened?"
She turned around and Tsukuyomi looked at the phone, looking a little concerned.
"Are you still worried about Brother Soya?"
Hanada Xiacai came over to pull him and said, "Don't worry. Although he may be a little emotional now, he will definitely thank me in the future."
Tsukuyomi followed her to the bathroom.
"Who told me that my analysis is not bad at all?"
Her analysis was not bad at all.
Even his anger seemed to be within her expectation.
After taking a few deep breaths, Sogu threw the phone back beside the pillow and looked at Asagiri Suzu again.
"Are the words that Ms. Hanada said just now what Ling wanted to tell me?"
In order to make it easier to communicate later, he turned on the speakerphone when the call was connected, and she heard every word of what Hanada Xia Cai said.
Chao Wuling nodded.
"Do you think she's right?"
"..."
Soya didn't say anything, and Asagiri Suzu didn't ask any further questions.
She understood that he had already heard it, but he was just not willing to admit it for a while.
Silence spread in the room.
After sitting opposite each other for a while, Chao Wuling stood up and returned to his bed, reaching for the lamp.
Before turning off the lights, the two looked at each other.
"Don't forget, you have to go on a date with me tomorrow."
"……Um."
"Like lovers."
"..."
Snap.
Darkness returned to their eyes, and the two of them fell asleep facing each other deeper into the night with their own thoughts.
The impact of Hanada Natsuna's words just now was far deeper than Soya thought.
After clearing away all the fog, all kinds of myths and concerns, they all finally came to one question:
Is his escape a compromise with many realities, or is it because he likes the ideal Yoshiaki Sotani who is perfect both internally and externally, and is unwilling to accept the current person who is suffering from violating the moral sense in his heart and at the same time is in desire?
Indulging yourself deeper and deeper?
A false self.
Because I am powerless, I try to let time solve the problem myself.
No matter what answer he chooses, some facts will not change: he and them are no longer inseparable.
"..."
Listening to the deep breathing on the other bed, Chao Wuling closed his eyes and sighed silently.
He needs time to accept himself like this.
However, he doesn't have much time anymore...
Time will not stop for anyone.
The night is long and will eventually pass.
The next morning, Sogu woke up first.
The rising sun falls on the translucent beige curtains, illuminating the room.
The confusion when he first woke up quickly subsided, and the deep thoughts from last night surged up again, quickly filling every corner of his heart.
"..."
Zonggu took a deep breath and suppressed all his thoughts.
He sat up and looked at the bed next to him. Chaogiri Ling was still asleep.
She was lying on the quilt, her body curled up and sunk in the middle of a big quilt. Wrapped in a bathrobe that was too large, she looked even more petite.
After looking at her for a while, Zonggu got up and got out of bed, then slowly sat down on the edge of her bed, keeping his eyes on her.
His eyes were closed, and his body rose and fell slightly while breathing. His short hair covered his ears and half of his face, and his skin was as white and flawless as porcelain.
"Considered as 'lovers'..."
Putting such a "label" on her always made him feel a subtle sense of betrayal, even though they had lived together for so many years, they had long been closer than lovers.
She is different from them, Soya thought.
Even if we don't know that she has actually lived for more than 1,200 years, or her relationship with the Lord of the Underworld, she is still unique.
She is his family.
It's nothing more than that when distinguishing from family relationships such as mothers and sisters, it is necessary to emphasize her difference with the attribution of wife.
"……bell."
When he came back to his senses, Zong Gu realized that she had woken up and was looking at him.
"Good morning."
"Good morning……"
Asagiri Suzu sat up, and the loose bathrobe on her body was unrestrained and slid down from her shoulders.
She got out of her bathrobe, climbed naked in front of him, and raised her hand to smooth his eyebrows.
"what's on your mind."
"I was thinking...Ling is my family."
"Is this an excuse to comfort yourself?"
He was silent for a while, then shook his head.
Moving her knees, she came closer and hugged his neck.
"I am your destination."
Zong Gu pursed his lower lip, raised his hand, stroked her smooth back, and then hugged her tightly.
"Get dressed, let's go downstairs to have breakfast."
She let go of her hands, sat down on the edge of the bed, and opened her arms to him, like a doll waiting to be dressed up.
Taking out her clothes from her travel bag, Zonggu still chose to cover the key parts first.
Lift the thin piece of cloth up from the calf to the knee, then lift it up to the base of the leg, and release it with a snap.
"Will you have desire for my body?" she asked suddenly.
"What are you talking about suddenly?" Zonggu picked up the bra on his upper body again.
"No way?" She stepped on his heart, then subconsciously moved away and stepped on the middle of his chest.
"Okay." He motioned for her to come closer so that he could put on the bra.
"Really."
"Um."
Her feet kept falling against his body, from his chest to his abdomen, and still going down.
Just when he was about to touch the evidence between her legs, he grabbed her ankle.
"You'll really feel it if you go further down..."
"No way."
"Don't do weird things."
She didn't say anything, then sat up straight and let him put on her underwear.
"Do you want to wear this dress today?"
"Um."
His head emerged from the T-shirt, shook his head at Wuling, and then stretched out his arms from the cuffs on both sides.
After putting on her shorts, she got up and got out of bed, lifted the zipper, fastened the buttons, and completed the last steps.
Zonggu moved faster on his own, changed his clothes, washed up and went downstairs together.
Breakfast is provided on the second floor of the hotel, buffet style, and there are not many guests at this time.
Holding the plates, the two of them picked a few dishes each and found a seat by the window to sit down.
"Today is the last day of the festival."
Zonggu looked down while eating. There were few people on the road. He didn't pay attention to when the carnival on the street ended last night. He only knew that the morning was the time for the revelers to rest.
Asagiri Suzu drank the flavored soup, looked at him again, and said, "When we come back, let's go buy a yukata together."
"Should I wear it too?"
"Um."
Zonggu agreed.
After breakfast, the two left the hotel and strolled around the shopping street in front of the station for a while, then got on the train and headed to Aoba District in the north of the city.
The sun is rising gradually, and the scene outside the car window gradually becomes deserted.
Not long after, they arrived at a station near their destination.
After getting off the tram, he walked for more than ten minutes. When he turned the corner, Sogu paused and suddenly hesitated.
"..."
Looking at Asagiri Suzu who was holding his palm, he took a deep breath and said, "Go over."
"Um."
When they walked to the entrance of the institution, a middle-aged man in the guard room stuck his head out and looked at the two of them.
"This is Qingye Children's Welfare Home, who are you looking for?"
－－－－－－Digression－－－－－
I chose the name casually at the time, but I didn’t expect that Sendai actually has an Aoba district.