The moment this idea appeared, Xiao Xiao suddenly woke up with a start, and was so frightened that he was covered in cold sweat.
He was almost the slowest for the first time in his life, but after reacting, he also entered the most panicked state of thinking explosion. He quickly analyzed his current mental and psychological state, and then became more and more shocked: "Why did I suddenly have a baby?"
Have you ever had such an idea? Just so naturally, I suddenly had the idea that maybe death can solve all problems..."
My mood has become extremely gloomy, and I actually feel that death has become the only thing that still has color.
"Am I being affected by something?"
"Is it this influence that caused my current emotional changes?"
"Is this a power that can make me lose all happiness, liveliness, and joy, leaving me with only a gloomy mood?"
"..."
Xiao Xiao analyzed quickly in his mind, and even hesitated for a moment whether to continue moving forward.
At this moment, his cell phone suddenly rang. He almost needed to muster up a lot of motivation before he was willing to pick up the phone, as if he knew that the information coming from the phone was very important, but he didn't.
I am too lazy to look at it, because I feel that there is nothing in the world that I need to care about or care about: "You have entered the radiation range, please proceed with caution."
"You can quit when necessary."
"..."
Only then did Xiao Xiao notice that there were no longer any living people in the surrounding wards on both sides.
It seems that it is precisely because of this that Mr. Ye cannot communicate with himself through other people's mouths and can only send messages.
"Do you want to quit?"
Xiao Xiao hesitated for a moment, but continued to walk forward.
He also determined that this kind of radiation power was terrifying, but the ability to think explosively could help him alleviate it a little bit.
The power of this kind of emotional radiation is like polluting a blank piece of paper.
Xiao Xiao discovered a long time ago that the explosion of his mind was like endlessly stretching the white paper, preventing it from being completely covered.
So he tensed up his mind, went deeper step by step, and clearly felt his emotions falling into the endless abyss.
Gradually, even though he had reacted and started to consciously fight against this invisible pollution, he still felt that his mood was getting more and more depressed. Everything he could perceive became gray and pale, and everything was boring.
Instead, they piled up into a thick, terrifying cloud layer that cut off all sunlight, rain and dew, leaving only a gloomy gloom in my heart.
Death has become the only temptation.
It's like being locked in an airtight dark room, every second seems like ten years and a hundred years.
Death is the only key to leaving this dark room.
After taking a few steps, he even stepped back, took off the silver pistol and dagger from his body, and placed them in the corner.
I don't dare to move forward with these things, for fear that my desire for death will make me shoot myself.
In this way, he endured the endless sense of depression, fought against the "desire for death" that had become a real and only desire, and walked towards the end of the corridor little by little. Before that, it was even difficult for him to understand that "death" could also be possible.
Becomes like "hunger" and "sexual desire", so strong that it occupies the deepest part of one's soul?
The gloom that accumulated in my heart has turned into complete darkness.
He even felt that every move was so difficult. He felt that his body had been taken over by darkness, stiff and cold.
Even the body is longing for death, but the spirit is still suffering and suffering...
The nosebleed slowly flowed out.
This is a phenomenon in which Xiao Xiao has even used his ability to think explosively to the extreme.
If it weren't for the ability to think explosively, he didn't know how long he could last, and he might have shot himself long ago.
But just when he exceeded his limit, he finally came to the end of the corridor.
Turning around stiffly, I saw a person sitting on a chair in the center of an empty room on the left.
The door to the ward was not opened, or rather, it was torn down.
It was just open, and there was only a plastic chair in the empty room, and the figure sat quietly on it.
He was wearing a black skirt, but strangely, Xiao Xiao was sure that he was a man.
His slender arms were placed on his knees, and they were covered with marks of knife cuts.
[Forbidden Things: Those Favored by Death]
[Danger level: Class A]
[Explanation: In a dark and boring world, death has become the only sweet candy]
【……】
"A-level?"
Xiao Xiao couldn't help but be slightly shocked.
This was the first time he saw an A-level special item.
No, it's not the first time. It seems that the little girl from the Kingdom of Decay whom I met before was also A-level.
But for Xiao Xiao, when he saw the little girl, he was not afraid because he didn't understand it. The impact she brought to him at that time was far less than the deep depression exuding from the man in front of him.
, and a sense of gloomy despair.
"Is this the woman you are talking about? But he is obviously a man..."
He talked to himself and asked Mr. Ye.
At this moment, the mobile phone rang. It was next to this woman. The ringtones of the mobile phones seemed extremely dull and slow. It was as if the ringtone was heard across a sea. Xiao Xiao picked up the phone with his clumsy limbs and heard it.
Mr. Ye’s words:
"Yes, that's her. The name is correct."
"He is the only Class A aberrant creature that has appeared in Black Gate City in recent years but has not been eliminated."
"..."
"A-level aberrant creature?"
Xiao Xiao was even more surprised: "Even the Kingdom of Decay is only a Class B aberration."
"Yes."
The microphone was clearly attached to his ear, but Mr. Ye's voice seemed to come from the horizon: "The old president and I discovered her a long time ago, but we did not get rid of her. Because of some special circumstances, she was under control
She did not release the influence of distortion, but because of this, she became the biggest threat to the entire Black Gate City, not only threatening us, but also threatening the hell organization."
"It's just that she is too uncontrollable, so I don't have the ability to take advantage of her threat."
"..."
Xiao Xiao took a deep breath and said, "So, you want me to try it?"
Mr. Ye said: "As the president, you are qualified to decide whether to use her or get rid of her."
Xiao Xiao was silent for a moment, countless thoughts quickly flashed through his mind, and then he made a decision in a very short time.
He remained silent, but quickly looked at the man with his three discerning eyes.
The ability of the discerner was undoubtedly revealed at this moment. As the three eyes observed and then overlapped, he saw some spiritual power released by the huge emotional radiation in this man, and then began to investigate this spirit.
The power is analyzed, just like in this man, the dual flow of space and time has begun, but there will not be so much pressure.
Under normal circumstances, when Xiao Xiao uses this ability in reality, or at the city level, there will be a huge load and pressure. That is because he is looking back at the time and space of the entire city, but for a single person, the load is huge.
And the pressure is much less.
One of the third-stage abilities of the clairvoyant can perhaps be called: mental profiling?
Looking back at the city level, I was profiling the spiritual power of this city level, but now, I am profiling the individual.
…
…
Everything around him suddenly became illusory, and Xiao Xiao saw life slice by slice:
This sanatorium, whose facilities have become somewhat backward, often receives some special patients, including middle-aged men who can always hear fantasies and auditory hallucinations, and women who can't always control their tempers. But as this sanatorium
They are all used to the nursing staff in the hospital, especially a girl who always loves to smile and seems to be bathed in sunshine. She is the most patient with them.
This girl always smiles to everyone, especially to the young boy.
For some unknown reason, the boy fell into deep depression. He was sent here by his family because he repeatedly cut his wrists or swallowed sleeping pills. The hospital's responsibility is to take good care of him and cure him to avoid the day when he really succeeded.
suicide.
The young female caregiver took good care of him, chatted with him, brought him small gifts, and talked about movies with him.
The boy knew that she wanted to arouse his desire to survive. He also calmly explained to the girl that he had always been in a gloomy spiritual world and that there was nothing worthy of his concern in this world. This was not pretentious, but
I really can only feel this kind of gloomy thing. I have tried every means, but I just can't make myself happy, I feel depressed.
"It's so painful, I just want it to end."
He explained everything very calmly, without even asking her to understand.
"I understand."
The girl smiled and replied: "Depression is like this. As long as you take medicine on time, you can always cure yourself. After curing yourself, you can feel happy again. These gloomy emotions and tides of despair
, will all disappear.”
The boy remained silent and had no hope.
Because even after he came to the hospital, he had attempted suicide several times, so the hospital treated him as a thorn in the side and kept an eye on him. Therefore, after the girl persuaded him several times, she could only use force on him.
After finding her trump card, she held his hand pitifully and said: "Now you are in my charge, you can't harm me. If you die, my hope of promotion and salary increase will be ruined."
The boy closed his eyes silently, he really couldn't bear to ruin her future.
Because this sunny girl has a clear plan for her life. She has to go to work, make money, marry a very handsome husband in the future, have three children, raise a dog and a cat, and live her best life.
The look of happiness and beauty...
He envied this warm and bright life and couldn't bear to destroy it.
So he was enduring it, even if the desire for death always came out of his mind quietly.
I can't feel sorry for this girl, she has always been very good to me.
However, this kind of patience is powerless. The world is getting darker and darker, so dark that I can't breathe. Bit by bit, the darkness has accumulated, and it has even begun to turn into darkness. The intense darkness that cannot be resolved has taken hold.
My body is so stiff and numb, as if even breathing has become a luxury, as if every second of despair weighs a ton and is constantly accumulating.
Death has become the only sweet candy.
That kind of temptation gradually overwhelmed everything, and still made him want to chase it impatiently.
After another attempt, he almost fell into a peaceful sleep, but was still discovered and rescued.
While lying on the hospital bed, he saw the girl again. The girl had changed into casual clothes, a small black skirt, and her face looked very pale. It was only after he saw the girl that he realized that he had not seen her for a long time.
Yes, she has lost weight.
"Why are you seeking death again?"
She held his palm with an angry expression: "So many people want to live, why do you have to seek death?"
He was unable to explain because he had lost the desire to explain.
Then the girl looked at his expression and suddenly reached out and took off her hair.
She originally had thick and beautiful hair, but now she turned into a bald head. Tears welled up in her red eyes: "I want to live. I am not married yet and I have no children of my own. I just
I know overtime and work, and I haven’t even raised a puppy of my own, but I’m going to die. The doctor said my disease can’t be cured and I’m going to die..."
He hadn't felt shocked for a long time, and his emotions were like a lake of stagnant water, never wavering.
But at this time, a ripple appeared uncontrollably. He leaned up in disbelief and looked at the girl.
"How I want to live..."
The girl held his hand, and tears of fear flowed from her eyes: "But I have no chance to live anymore."
"You had a chance to live, but why did you refuse?"
"This is the last time I come to see you. Can you promise me?"
"Stop seeking death, just think of it as fulfilling my wish to live, okay?"
"..."
"..."
He never saw the girl again after that.
I asked other caregivers, but all I saw were expressions of regret.
But whenever the turbulent despair came at night, he could always see the girl's red eyes, and see her crying and begging him to let him survive her share of life, so he felt a kind of
Unprecedented pressure, all I can do is hold on.
Living is painful, but I have no power to end this pain.
Because I promised that girl, I could only keep my promise and live in this world for her.
This nursing home found a turning point: "The most difficult one in the hospital is the one who constantly thinks about suicide, as if he lives just to commit suicide. Now he seems to have become better. In the past, he would always make trouble every once in a while.
It was difficult for everyone to take precautions, but now he is fine. He asked the doctor for a little black dress, and he will wear this dress every time he gets sick."
"Then he will no longer commit suicide. He will just sit there quietly and wait for the urge to die to pass."
"That little skirt is more useful than a restraint belt..."
