Teacher Zheng stood up and said: "I haven't eaten yet, please accompany me for a drink. I haven't drank for a long time and I don't like drinking. Since you brought me Maotai, I had to drink, but I didn't."
Yes, even if I ask you to take it back, you won’t be able to bring it back. It’s useless for me to ask for it myself. Let’s have a drink together and treat it as celebrating the New Year with me.”
Zhao Mingyang stood up and took off his clothes. He lifted up the sleeves of his shirt and said, "Okay, I'll cook you some dishes. I can handle the seafood."
"Can you cook?" Teacher Zheng looked at Zhao Mingyang and said.
"Isn't that right? Take a look at my skills." Zhao Mingyang opened the foam box and started cooking.
In the kitchen, two men were busy.
Zhao Mingyang asked Xiao Hulu to go eat some food first. He wanted to have dinner with the teacher and would go back later.
Xiao Hulu was chatting on video with his younger sisters in the car, and sent out several red envelopes in the family group. The group red envelopes can be given out in large amounts. He sent out 2015 to let his family members grab the red envelopes. He sent out ten 2015 red envelopes.
, he also asked his sister to look at the house. He bought her a small apartment before getting married. She also had to have one, and he wanted the old house at home.
Xiao Gourd also lives for his family. He values family relationships too much, because without his parents, he only has his elder sister and younger sister. He doesn't want them to suffer any injustice.
As long as he sees them living well, he will be extremely happy and happy.
Mom and dad have told Xiao Hulu since he was a child that he is a boy and should take good care of his older sisters and protect them. He has fulfilled his promise to his parents.
An hour later, Zhao Mingyang and Teacher Zheng were drinking wine and served eight dishes, four hot dishes and four cold dishes.
Teacher Zheng picked up the wine glass and said to Zhao Mingyang: "Do you know what the Spring Festival in China, Christmas in the West, and New Year celebrations in other regions have in common?"
"This is not very clear yet. Let me tell you, teacher." Zhao Mingyang picked up his wine glass and clinked it with Teacher Zheng.
Teacher Zheng took a sip of wine and said: "It's very simple. Human beings have found a way of hope and relief for themselves. The earth rotates, the sun rises as usual, and the concept of time is the crystallization of human wisdom. But have you discovered it?
, go to school, from kindergarten to elementary school, first grade to second grade, and so on to middle school, just like a fledgling in a martial arts novel to a powerful one, it is all incremental, just like a game, after passing the first level,
People will look forward to the second level in their hearts, and they will feel happy physically and mentally.
The same goes for the Chinese New Year. One year is a time cycle, just like a level. No matter whether people play this level smoothly or not, they have passed. After passing this level, they have passed. When they reach the second level, they have passed.
End of the year.
Everyone will be full of new hopes and expectations for the next year. If there is no New Year, people will not see hope and have no expectations. This is terrible. Most people cannot withstand this kind of pressure. The New Year is the best
Pressure relief method.
If everyone is in a level and can never pass it, how many people do you think will continue to play?
Everyone needs something to look forward to, that is hope, so do you think the New Year is one of the greatest inventions in human history?
What a great invention this is. Traditional Chinese festivals are the greatest crystallization of wisdom left by our ancestors. If you don’t pay attention to festivals, especially festivals like the Spring Festival, then this person basically has no hope. No hope means no hope.
, without hope, you will be trapped in an emotion and cannot get out.
Staying at one level forever, I am trapped in this level. I have been focusing on celebrating the New Year these years and don’t want to stay in this level anymore.
Therefore, we still need to pay attention to this festival. It is terrible for the people at the bottom to have no hope. Now that I am alone, my only hope is that the days will get better and better. I want to live well and watch the changes of the times. Everything
Everything will get better, come on, man, and let the other one go."
Zhao Mingyang picked up his wine glass and clinked it with Teacher Zheng. If we were in a threesome, we would definitely have my teacher. Teacher Zheng’s words once again enlightened Zhao Mingyang. He had a new understanding of the Chinese New Year and he was ready to have a good time.
Year.
"Mingyang, the age you are living in now is good, really good. You have choices, but we really had no choice back then.
The girl I liked, she had no choice in the beginning. We were shackled and fearful, and she lost a lot of courage. She even lost her self. She lost her self, and I lost my self.
When she got married, I cried alone. Our love was ignorant, innocent, and unadulterated. But in the end, I chose to escape.
In the winter of my senior year in high school, she got married. I took a bottle of liquor and drank a bottle of wine on the hillside near her husband's house. I watched her step by step into the groom's house. It was the most drink I had ever had in my life.
Bitter wine is the kind of wine that won't make you drunk. It's the kind of wine that declares the failure of my life.
If I had chosen not to study and marry her, she would have married me and I would have helped support her family. At least we could be together."
Teacher Zheng sighed and drank the wine in the glass. Zhao Mingyang filled it up for him. He covered his face with his hands and said: "She came to me before she got married and asked me to study hard to prepare for the exam and go to a good university. Go for her."
Take a look at the outside world.
As long as I had a little courage at that time, just a little bit of courage, I chose to keep her. You can see the outside world at any time, but missing someone is a lifetime, but I didn’t have the courage and didn’t dare to speak. She was lost.
I can still see his back.
I'm afraid that my parents will blame me, and I'm afraid of disappointing my family. I know that my family is proud of me, because I'm a high school student and I'm going to take the college entrance examination. There aren't many people in the town who can take the college entrance examination.
All my parents' reputation is supported by me, a quasi-college student.
I retreated. I also wanted to see the outside world. I was even more afraid of taking responsibility. I wanted to marry her and I didn’t know how to support her.
I thought, I thought I would be fine after I went to college. When the college notice came home that year, my family was so happy. My parents had smiles, confidence and pride that had never appeared on their faces.
As shown above, my dad’s back is straight when he walks.
I want to share my joy with her, but I don't dare to go, I'm afraid to go, I don't know how to say these words to her, I don't deserve it.
What do you think I said to her? I can’t say anything. I saw her once before I left for college. The light in her eyes was gone. She seemed to have aged more than ten years in an instant, and her hands had become rough.
She smiled at me, said nothing, and left quickly. Looking at her back, my words were stuck in my throat, I couldn't say it, I couldn't say it~ I wanted her to go with me, fly far away with me, and be with me.
Let’s go see the outside world together, but I don’t have the courage to say it. What happens after I leave? Where should I take her? How to deal with livelihood? How to let the family face rumors?
After that, I went to college and saw a lot of the world. I wrote everything I saw and heard into letters and prepared to send them to her. However, after writing dozens of letters, I didn’t send any of them. I didn’t dare to send them. I'm afraid of going out, I'm really afraid. I don't know what I'm afraid of. I'm just afraid. Maybe I'm afraid of what other people will think if they see this letter? Will rumors describe me as Ximen Qing?
When I returned home during the summer vacation of my freshman year, I heard that she was having a very bad life because she was not pregnant and was treated coldly by her husband's family. In addition, her mother-in-law's family ignored her and she was often beaten and scolded by her husband. .
I didn't even have the courage to complain for her. I was still afraid. I was afraid that if I went like this, people would spread gossip and embarrass my parents. I was afraid that my parents wouldn't be able to withstand the harm caused by such rumors.
Because of my cowardice, I indirectly harmed her. She jumped into a river when I was a sophomore in college. It is said that she couldn't bear the beating. Some people also said that her husband lost money in gambling and sold her as a bargaining chip. She couldn't bear it. This humiliation.
Some people say that she visited the school before she left. Our high school school also sent me a letter, a farewell letter. She still asked me to go to school well and see the world for her.
Farewell, this time is a farewell, I no longer have to be afraid of the consequences and bad influence that her things will bring, and I no longer have to worry about some problems.
I'm relieved, I don't have to think so much. You know, my family is actually poor. When I was a freshman in high school, the toes of the shoes I wore were sewn up with needle and thread. They would break open even if I took a few steps. I didn't even dare to When running, my clothes are full of patches, which are pieces of clothes worn by several children at home. They look like the rags worn by beggars in movies and TV shows.
I had very low self-esteem at that time. I went from a small town to a county town to attend high school, or to be precise, from a small village to a county town to attend high school. It was as if I had traveled to another world. There was no electricity in our village at that time and even candles were lit. I didn’t even see them. Crossing lights.
There were fewer people in the school who were poorer than me, so my family had to grit their teeth to support me in going to school. My family put all their hopes in me, especially my parents and older brothers and sisters.
Their words again and again were like shackles, especially because it was not easy for me to study. I must study hard and don't let my family down. These words made me suffocate.
In school, I basically only read books in addition to studying. I didn’t dare to waste a minute. I had no friends. I didn’t like talking to others. I didn’t feel involved in what my classmates said. Until I met her, she was in the next class with me. , we live in the same place, we all have the same way home, and her family is also poor.
The two of us are so poor together, because we only eat the same food every day, steamed buns, pickles, rice porridge, a lot of people ate this in our day, and some of us couldn't afford it, so we all look sallow, thin, and malnourished. ah.
I remember that she and I both loved the vegetable soup in the cafeteria. I could drink three large bowls of the free vegetable soup in the school cafeteria because it had a little bit of oil and vegetables in it. She also loved vegetable soup.
From the beginning, we were strangers and had the same low self-esteem. Then we started chatting and had endless chats. Finally, the two classes merged into one and we became classmates because several teachers left and it was said that they all went to teach in the city. There are not enough teachers left, so we have to merge classes.
That was the happiest time in my life. We wrote some secrets to each other in a notebook. Gradually, we knew what love was and what friendship was. We were not friendship, we were love.
Later, we both promised to go to the same university in the same place, and then we worked together to make our family better.
We also swore that we could only get married to each other. In the second semester of our second year of high school, she kissed me on a moonlit night. At that time, I was completely overwhelmed and extremely excited. I even fantasized about our future days.
Which guests will be invited to the wedding and what will be the name of the child?
But the next day, the school said she would not go to school, so she went home. Only then did I realize that it was called a kiss goodbye, and a goodbye lasted a lifetime.
Later, when she passed away, my love was over. It was over forever. I would never love anyone again. I felt extremely guilty. I was living in guilt.
A few years after she left, her husband married another daughter-in-law, but she still couldn't get pregnant. She refused and asked him to go for a check-up. It turned out that it was his problem, male infertility, so I returned the favor to my beloved.
The girl is innocent, but who still remembers her?
There was a small mound in her grave. If I didn't remove the weeds for her, no one would go there. But who would know that I removed the weeds late at night?
Later, after I graduated from college, I worked abroad for several years. I felt uneasy and uneasy, so I wanted to come back.
At that time, when I came back to our school to be a teacher, I was demoted and my salary was reduced. The junior high school you studied in used to be our high school. Some areas in the county and urban areas merged, and the original county high school became an urban middle school.
Our village has also become an industrial park, and the only thing left is the school. The one-third-acre land is still there, which is the memory that proves she was here.
I feel very at ease in this school. I hang around the school every day. Although the school has changed, the playground has not changed much. I just like to sit alone on the playground and be in a daze.
All the money I earned later was given to my family. This house was allocated to me by my work unit and I didn’t buy a house. All the money I earned was given to my parents and other brothers and sisters. I can distribute it however they want. It can be regarded as a kind of repayment.
, after all, they provided for me to study, otherwise what use would the study be to them? You are right.
I also made a will for the house I live in now. When I am no longer here, the house will be distributed to my brothers, sisters and descendants. This should repay their kindness for supporting my education, right? People, sometimes there is a choice.
Wrong, it will last a lifetime.
You said that if she didn't have such a family, her life would be so beautiful. Maybe it's all fate. Sometimes the fate of the people at the bottom is so cruel, so cruel that they have no choice, just like there are ten blind boxes.
One hundred yuan can be drawn once, one is empty, and one contains ten thousand yuan. Children from poor families only have one chance, either they win or they don't win.
If you win, you will make money. If you don't, it will be difficult to turn around. If you have nothing and the worse you get, you have to rely on luck.
And the children with a good family directly took a thousand yuan to open one by one, then they must have won. They don't need luck. For their number of trials and errors, nine trials and errors, one success, they are successful, and we are successful.
What? One failure and it’s over.
Once we succeeded, we were lucky and got 10,000. But in the next round, whether we will draw 10,000 once or ten blind boxes, we have to bet on luck again. Do you think how many people can survive this round?
Most people just stopped playing. They gave up when they got good. They didn't dare to play anymore and stayed at 10,000. But this time there is a million in the blind box. Those who play have to try their luck, and those with wealth are trying.
wrong.
As a result, some people may be lucky enough to earn a million, and they will have to go through the next round, but the next round they can play is one million, or ten opportunities, but there is one hundred million there.
, there are three or four knives in the remaining nine, if you draw one, you may get knifed.
At this time, no one dared to bet on luck. They were betting on life. Another group of people gave up. The lucky ones won the bet, but what about the group of people with background? If they succeeded in drawing the knife, someone would take their lives for them. They continued to draw,
Continue trial and error, and the last 100 million will still be theirs.
Similarly, the elders of this group of people came here the same way. In the beginning, they all worked hard for luck. Only their younger generations can do without luck. Do you understand what I said to Mingyang? No matter how good you are now, you are
You're gambling on luck, so you can't do something blindly and be cautious.
Unless you have the opportunity to try and make mistakes, you will not be afraid to do something. Otherwise, you can only be cautious and accept it when it is good. Don't dislike the teacher's long-winded words."
"I know, thank you for your reminder, teacher. I will pay attention to it. Teacher, I salute you." Zhao Mingyang picked up the wine glass and toasted a glass of wine. Teacher Zheng was not very strong in drinking. After a few glasses of wine, he squinted and fell asleep.
Zhao Mingyang carried him to bed to rest. He might really need to get drunk. His family might blame him and humiliate him for not getting married, and even say uglier words than outsiders.
Times are different, and everyone's situation is different. Maybe it was not a right choice for him to choose not to go to college. It was not because of love, but because of guilt that he could not convince himself to forget this guilt.
Maybe he has such a good temper. He not only encourages Zhao Mingyang in class, but also encourages many people. He hopes that every child will not go astray. In this era, everyone has more choices, but many people don’t want to study. But it was so difficult to study in the first place.
, especially the girl he loves.
Zhao Mingyang closed the door of the teacher's house and left. His life ended early because of a choice. Maybe he and the girl stayed at the age of eighteen forever. She left, and he was helping her see the world. After reading
Later I went to the tomb and told her.
Maybe now he dares to talk to her without fear of anyone's strange looks or comments. After all, no one remembers her, only he remembers her.
Zhao Mingyang walked downstairs and heard the cheers of children and the sound of firecrackers. A smile appeared on his lips. It was the New Year. It was great. A new beginning had arrived.
If she lived in this era, would the ending be different? Right?
Who knows? Maybe he will choose to stay for her? Will he? Will he?
Zhao Mingyang got into the car, took a look at his phone, and sent a message.
