Volume 1: Swan Goose Chapter 383: Dreaming of the End of the World
--mischief--
Perhaps the journey was too tiring, and although the delegation and the others were dissatisfied with the Jinglong Mansion, they still slept soundly, almost without a dream.
The next morning, before dawn, the door to the east wing was hurriedly pushed open.
Toto was awakened by the urge to urinate, rushed out with his pants in his arms, looked around, and then found a place to start.
Just as he was enjoying himself, a roar suddenly came from behind: Hey, do you know where this is, do you dare to pee here? Do you not want to live anymore?"
Toto pulled up his pants and turned around calmly. When he saw the two clerks with stern looks on their faces, he said angrily: "What are you yelling about! I didn't know you can't pee here!"
The two clerks looked at the man in front of them: he was ugly, his ears were exposed to the wind, and his nostrils were turned up. He didn't look like a good person at first glance.
"Who are you? How come you are here? Do you know where this is?"
Toto held his head high and said fiercely: "I am a member of the mission, and I came here to find Mr. Wang. What's wrong? You just peed, and you hit me?"
The two clerks looked at each other and immediately understood: they couldn't offend the people in the mission, but they couldn't easily let go of this rare opportunity. After all, the officials from the capital must be extremely rich!
The two of them immediately changed their faces and said in an awkward tone: "Oh, as the saying goes, those who don't know are not guilty! But we can't break the rules. Let's just fine you five taels of silver and forget about it!"
Toto smiled coldly and took out a large ingot from his arms without hesitation, and put it in the hands of the two young officials: "Take it, there are enough ten taels of silver!"
The two clerks looked at each other and were stunned. They immediately became happy and said in a pretentious manner: "Oh, I don't have any silver coins with me to give you! How about I bring it to you later?"
But Toto waved his hand and said generously: "No need to look for it, just treat it as a reward from grandpa!"
With the money, the two clerks immediately laughed from ear to ear. Even if they were forced to become grandsons, they didn't care: "Since my brother is so generous, we won't be polite! Let's take good care of him in the future!"
After saying that, the two immediately put the ingot into their arms and walked away side by side, laughing and joking.
Seeing the two clerks walking away, Toto sighed, gritted his teeth and cursed: "Huh, you are just as greedy for money as that dog official! Let's see if Grandpa Toto doesn't give you a good look!"
----------------------------------------
After a while, people from the Jinglong Mansion Yamen got up and came to work in the courtyard or lobby one after another. They just wanted to show off in front of the envoys, and maybe get some rewards.
The prefect Wang also got up, breathed out and walked out of the wing. He stretched his waist and wondered what sweet dream he had last night, with a happy smile on his face.
Everyone who was working in the courtyard saw the prefect coming over to say hello.
The prefect Wang immediately straightened his back, put on a bureaucratic smile, and waved gently to everyone. Unexpectedly, his foot slipped, the back of his head hit the door frame, and he sat down on the ground, letting out a scream.
The sound startled the government officials in the yard and hurried over to check.
With the help of the yamen servant, the prefect Wang stood upright. He rubbed his head, straightened his official hat, and quickly lowered his head to look at the ground.
When he saw a pile of excrement that he had crushed under his feet, he immediately became furious: "Where are the patrolling officers? Where have they died? Who pooped at my door? Who did it? Get out of here, me."
come out!"
When everyone saw his embarrassed appearance, they all couldn't help but laugh, but they didn't dare to laugh out loud. The clerks beside him looked at each other and shook their heads frequently in denial.
At this time, the prefect Wang was furious and kept shouting: "Which bastard did this? Get out of here! I'm going to skin him..."
The onlookers tried their best to endure the outpouring of laughter, holding their breath as hard as they could, and were embarrassed to pinch their noses in front of him.
Although at this time, the Wang Prefecture smelled more like a toilet that hadn't been emptied for three days.
"I pulled it!"
Finally, a fierce voice came from the crowd, and everyone looked back in surprise, only to see Toto holding his head high, pushing through the crowd and walking out.
When he saw Totuo come out, Wang Zhifu's eyes, which could never be opened, were as wide as bells. He realized that he had once again been tricked by the people from the mission!
He was shaking with anger, pointed at Toto's nose, and roared: "You... why are you shitting at my door?"
Toto immediately pointed to the two clerks on the side and said confidently: "It's none of my business! They asked me to do it!"
The prefect Wang immediately glared at the two minor officials. Their expressions suddenly changed, and they stammered in defense: "We...when did we let you shit at the door? You...don't slander anyone!"
Toto came over and pointed at the two clerks, and said seriously: "I was fined five taels of silver for peeing just now, and I gave them ten taels! They didn't have any money to give me, so they let me poop again.
So I did it!"
With a "Pfft" sound, some of the onlookers finally couldn't hold back and laughed out loud.
Such serious nonsense, only when it comes from Toto's mouth, will everyone feel: This is the truth!
The faces of the two clerks turned blue and white, and one of them yelled angrily: "You...you lied! We took you ten taels of silver, but when did you let your shit go? It wasn't you who said you didn't need to find it.
Is it done?」
Another person pointed at Toto and hurriedly echoed: "Yes, yes, why are you slandering others! You peed here, we stopped you and fined you money! How come you don't repent and still pee!"
"
Hearing the two men talking about money, Magistrate Wang actually forgot that he was covered in shit at this time.
He grabbed a clerk by the collar, bared his teeth and shouted, "Okay! How dare you secretly collect money behind my back! Take it out for me!"
After saying that, he couldn't wait to search the bodies of the two people.
For a moment, the three people rolled into a ball, covered in filth.
Xia Yunqing's face was livid, and she finally couldn't stand it anymore.
He shouted angrily: "That's enough! I am a magistrate, look what you are like now? You even gave up your face for ten taels of silver!"
Wang Zhifu finally let go of his hand, stood up, lowered his head and said angrily: "I am guilty of the crime! Please allow me to take a bath and change my clothes, and then I will listen to your punishment!"
Xia Yunqing frowned, glanced at him, and quickly waved his hand, before the prefect Wang turned around and returned to the house.
Xia Yunqing sighed and shouted again: "Toto, come out!"
Toto strode over and bowed his hands.
Xia Yunqing gave him a disgusted look and said with a straight face: "This is the magistrate's office. How can you relieve yourself on the ground at will? You don't take the court officials seriously!"
Toto raised his head and chest, raised his hands and said, "I am a rough man and I don't understand the rules! But I dare to take responsibility, and I will listen to the punishment without any complaints!"
Xia Yunqing saw that although he was rude and rude, he was very sincere in admitting his mistakes, so he sighed: "Well, today you will be responsible for cleaning up this yard! And you have to admit your mistakes to Mr. Wang face to face!"
Toto's face was full of anger and he shouted: "Master Xia, please give me dozens of blows, and I will never say a word! But if you want me to bow my head to that dog officer and admit my mistake, I would rather die than obey!"
"you!"
Xia Yunqing rolled up his sleeves and rebuked in a cold voice: "He is a court official. Whether he made a mistake or not, the court will convict him! If you have made a mistake now, you should admit it!"
But Totuo held his head high and refused to obey.
Hu Qi hurriedly walked over and whispered a few words in Toto's ear.
Immediately, he turned to Xia Yunqing, cupped his hands and said, "Don't worry, Mr. Xia, I will definitely take Brother Toto and apologize to the prefect in person!"
Xia Yunqing gave them a stern look, sighed, and walked away.
Mu Qianqian on the side felt very unconvinced when she saw this scene. But as soon as she rolled her eyes, she came up with a bad idea.
The prefect is preparing
When I went to freshen up, I was still thinking about the missing money. I couldn't help but think bitterly: I must find a way to get back these few taels of silver from those two yamen servants in the future!
In short, no matter who makes money in this yamen, his share cannot be lost!
Suddenly, a voice floated above the head: "Master Prefect, silver has fallen from the sky!"
"Where is it? Where is it?"
The prefect Wang was so happy that he didn't have time to think carefully about whether this was a trick or not. He opened his arms and cheerfully went to catch the baggage that dropped from the sky.
Unexpectedly, countless filthy things were poured down, including soup and water, and an indescribable stench soon filled the air, making people unable to help but feel nauseous.
"What is this? Why is it so smelly?" The master on the side ran to the side and asked while vomiting.
"Hahaha! What's so strange, that's stinky tofu!" A burst of laughter like silver bells came from above.
Everyone was startled and quickly looked up.
I saw a girl in black clothes and red shoes sitting among the branches, shaking her legs and laughing loudly.
The prefect Wang ignored the stench on his body and pointed at Mu Qianqian and cursed: "You, how dare you tease me! I will never let you go!"
How could the majestic heroine give up like this? She suddenly blew a loud whistle towards the door, then looked at Magistrate Wang and asked loudly: "Master Magistrate, do you know what kind of animals are interested in feces?"
The extremely embarrassed Magistrate Wang did not dare to move now, but when he heard this question, he was still stunned for a moment and did not react for a moment.
It wasn't until a frightening barking sound suddenly sounded, and several strong and ferocious wild dogs ran in frantically from the wide open back door, that the prefect Wang woke up as if from a dream.
"Dog! It's a wild dog!"
At this time, the frightened prefect Wang made an animal-like cry, then turned around and ran away.
But the wild dog was very fast, and in just the blink of an eye, it pounced on the smelly Wang Zhifu.
The government officials were stunned on the spot and looked at each other, but the master finally reacted, jumped to his feet and cursed: "Why are you still standing there! Go and save the master! If something happens to him, we will all die!"
Everyone reacted and immediately chased him out the door with sticks in hand.