"Assassin, before talking about myself, I have a question I want to ask you."
Kotomine Kirei also imitated Samura and crossed his legs, and the corners of his mouth slightly raised unconsciously.
"oh?"
Samura was already tipsy, but he didn't seem to have any intention of continuing to drink. He looked at Kotomine Kirei with interest and rubbed his hands.
"Question? Ask me?"
"So - what do you want to ask?"
"Ask about your life."
"I saw your life in my dream, Assassin Zuocun."
"But after looking at your life, there has always been a huge question lingering in my mind."
"Your life is miserable, right?"
He looked into Zuocun's eyes, and although he was asking, his tone was conclusive.
Zuo Cun fell silent.
He didn't intend to continue drinking, and poured himself another bowl of sake.
"Although I don't care what others think of me, you are right."
"The fictitious names of "Eagle of the Restoration and Yugui Zhan" simply don't matter."
"Hidden under the reputation is just that kind of life, haha"
Zuo Cun smiled nonchalantly and took a sip of sake.
He doesn't hate getting drunk, but he won't get drunk if he wants to.
"So, what's wrong? What thoughts has my miserable life given you?"
He glanced at Kotomine Kirei
If your own life can give your master some thoughts, it can be considered a good result.
"The end of the problem is not with me, Zuocun."
"It's up to you."
Kotomine Kirei has always had a smile on his face since this conversation.
"I?"
Zuo Cun pointed at himself.
"Why can you still live in this world with a smile like you do now after experiencing such a life?"
"You chose to end your life on the cliff, but you were still able to be summoned. After you were summoned, it was completely different from before you were alive. What does this Holy Grail War mean to you?"
"Can you—can you answer me?"
After asking several questions in a row, Kotomine Kirei licked his lips.
"Isn't this question very simple?"
"Why do you think I picked up the sword?"
"What do you think is the reason why I fell from power?"
"The meaning of the sword and the meaning of power does not lie in who you will kill with such power, but in what the person holding the sword wants to do."
"I'm here for——this era."
"era?"
"This is the current era."
Zuo Cun nodded and continued.
"I, Ryoma, Takasugi, Katsura, including those wolf cubs, and even Abe Masahiro and others, we have all chosen to embark on various paths for the sake of a new era that will no longer be decadent. I want to see
Yes, what I want to pursue through the Holy Grail is to see such a new era, but you also know that I have already realized this after being summoned."
"I don't want to use the Holy Grail to realize the 'new era' in my mind. A person's vision is narrow after all, even me. An era shaped by a single person will be lost after that person leaves the world.
It collapsed because it contained too much subjectivity and self-righteousness.”
"Then, the meaning of this Holy Grail War to me, Kirei, and the meaning of my war, is only you."
Samura had a smile on his face and looked at Kotomine Kirei with squinted eyes.
"Is it because of the real me?"
Kotomine Kirei pondered for a moment and asked with some uncertainty.
"Looking at you, you are indeed vaguely aware of it, Kirei."
Zuocun chuckled lightly and leaned back on the back of the sofa.
"What kind of person am I? What am I pursuing? What is happiness for me? I can't figure it out."
"I never figured it out."
"But I can't figure it out in any way, can you? Can you?"
There was actually a hint of uneasiness in this man's eyes.
Zuocun didn't answer immediately.
He just glanced at Kotomine Kirei, who had a hopeful look in his eyes, and then silently poured another glass of sake - one pot of sake had already been drunk by Samura, and he now opened the second pot.
"This question is actually the same as what I said before."
Taking a sip of sake, Zuo Cun's eyes were bright, but there seemed to be something else hidden under the brightness.
"You asked me what this Holy Grail War means to me, and I have already answered."
"And what this Holy Grail War means to you is your battle to pursue your own 'happiness'."
"my happiness?"
"That's pleasure."
"Pleasure?"
Kotomine Kirei frowned.
"I've made it clear, Kirei, you are a wicked person."
Samura stood up, walked behind Kotomine Kirei, sat on the back of the sofa, and looked down at Kotomine Kirei.
"Happiness to you is cruel, cruel, and vicious."
"The pain of others is your best spiritual food."
"Think about it, what were you thinking when you watched your wife die in front of you?"
"I"
Kotomine Kirei's eyes trembled.
The memory that he had been deliberately avoiding and hiding reappeared in your mind.
"What were you thinking about when your close teacher died?"
Without giving Kotomine Kirei time to digest his words, Samura continued.
"I"
Kotomine Kirei seemed to want to say something.
"Then - think about it again."
"How would you feel if other people around you, or even those close to you, suffered suffering, even suffering caused by you yourself?"
"Samura, Assassin, I——"
There was already a huge amount of sweat on Kotomine Kirei's head, and his expression was painful, as if he was suppressing something.
"You have to think about it, Kirei."
"You have to realize who you really are."
Samura jumped in front of Kotomine Kirei and sat on the coffee table.
He grabbed Kotomine Kirei's shoulder, grabbed it very hard, and forced Kotomine Kirei to look at him, expressionless and speaking in a cold tone.
"You must liberate your true self. This is the necessary way for you to truly become a person."
"Dig him out from where you have been hiding him for twenty-eight years!"
"You have to know what kind of person you are, and you have to understand your own essence."
"Because, there is only this - only this -"
thump--!
Kotomine Kirei violently pushed Ano Samura away.
He wanted to stand up, but his legs gave out and he fell to his knees.
"Ugh—"
He vomited.
He didn't know what he thought of, but after he knelt on the ground, he suddenly started vomiting violently.