Chapter 229 Twelve panics and very panics combined into one
Chapter 229: Twelve Panics, Very Panic (2-in-1, please subscribe)
Chapter 227
Xu Fu said with a sad face: "Sect Master, if...if you really need my blood, I...I can squeeze some for you!"
Hao Jian laughed and said: "Haha, that's not necessary..."
Xu Fu suddenly became cheerful and said, "Thank you so much, sect leader! The main thing is... I just want to say it out and don't want to hide it from the sect master anymore."
"Now that you've said it, you...are planning to return to your Tianmen?" Hao Jian asked doubtfully.
Xu Fu shook his head, "I can't go back! It's a bit embarrassing to say it... I have lived for so long, and I was almost beaten to death! Now that guy has occupied the magpie's nest and my heaven... If I go back, won't I do it again?
Got beaten! But then again, if I hadn’t been beaten, how could I have met the sect leader? So, a drink and a peck, could it be destiny?"
"Also, the sect master's guidance gave me a sudden enlightenment, and I now understood how to use the "Sacred Heart Art"! It is obviously my own martial arts, but I don't understand it as thoroughly as the sect master... This can be said to be: Tingjun
One conversation is worth a hundred years of reading... But the most important thing is the various experiences I have never had since following the sect leader, which made me seem to have rediscovered the seven emotions and six desires that a human being should have..."
If a person has no emotions, even if he can live forever, he is actually no different from a clay sculpture!
Just imagine, what would happen if you were the only person left in the world?
You may be very excited at first because you have endless houses and endless wealth...
But...this excitement may not last more than a week!
As for so-called wealth...does it still make sense?
For Xu Fu, the saying that time is the most precious wealth is completely meaningless, because what he lacks most is time...
Boredom was Xu Fu’s most common feeling in his seventeen hundred years of life!
Therefore, he gradually changed, whether it was participating in the world hegemony, becoming the supreme martial arts king, or having vigorous love affairs with many women... or even being bored to the point where he used his power to condense black ice to build the door of Tianmen.
…
It’s all caused by boredom!
What really changed Xu Fu's life... was Wu Wudi!
That battle stunned Xu Fu, but from another perspective, it woke him up again!
During the period after coming to Jianzong, Xu Fu discovered... It turns out that there is such weird music, which can even have such a great impact on people!
Then, Xu Fu slowly didn’t want to go back to Tianmen!
He felt that as long as he followed Hao Jian, he could experience fun that he had never had before!
This is the reason why he took the initiative to confess...oh no, confess his true identity.
"In this case... then you go back to Jianzong first!" Hao Jian said in a deep voice.
Xu Fu was startled and lost his voice: "Sect Master, you... you won't drive me away, will you?"
Hao Jian smiled and said: "Who said I would drive you away? Aren't you the twenty-fourth generation master of the Sword Sect? You are also a disciple of this generation... You can stay as long as you want."
Xu Fu nodded repeatedly, "Then... my subordinate will return to Jianzong first?"
"You go first, our sect has some things to deal with, and we will come back later," Hao Jian said.
…
Xu Fu left peacefully...
Well, I left, not went!
Grass, it’s still weird...
Forget it, none of this matters!
It wasn't until Xu Fuyuan left that Hao Jian looked at the forest on one side and said calmly: "I've been eavesdropping for so long, come out Pikachu!"
A figure walked out from the edge of the forest. It was a kind old man whose beard was as white as snow and who looked much older.
His hands were folded on his chest, revealing the backs of his hands with two marks on them.
Qinglong on the left, white tiger on the right, Xuanwu in the middle...
Um, no, no, it’s the burning sun on the left and the bright moon on the right.
With a smile on his face, he was one part curious, three parts appreciative, five parts kind, and seven parts doubtful.
He said happily: "Young man...what is...Pikachu?"
Hao Jian took one look, and a b-tree was already planted in his heart!
This is not the old turtle with Three Smiles, I stand on my head and have diarrhea!
He pondered for a moment, raised his hands, and made a scissor-hand gesture.
Hao Jian:(ｖ＾＿＾)v.
He gestured with his voice: "That's it... Pika, Pika, Pika, Chu! Old man, do you... understand?"
Xiao Sanxiao's old eyes widened, and he said as if he had seen a ghost: "What the hell is your Excellency?"
Hao Jian: "...Ignorant old guy! Thousand-year-old bastard... Ten-thousand-year-old you!"
The kind smile on Xiao Sanxiao's face froze, and he said: "Old... old thing? Bastard? You... you young man has no sense of etiquette! Do you know who you are talking to?"
Hao Jian pouted and said, "I'm talking to an old bastard."
Xiao Sanxiao: "...I have lived for so many years and have met more people than you have ever eaten. How dare you talk to me like this! I'm afraid I'll scare you to death if I say it. I am... Bai Xiao Kuangsheng.
The last panic in the list of 'Twelve Panics'! There are countless people in the world who want to see me but don't have that blessing. You are lucky to see me! You are so rude!"
Hao Jian sneered: "Then you laugh three times first!"
Xiao Sanxiao: "..."
He sighed and said immediately: "That's all, I don't have the same knowledge as you! Young man, first of all, I want to congratulate you on seeing you! Why do you say that? Because everyone in the world knows that no matter who sees me, I will satisfy him
desire!"
Hao Jian wondered: "Everyone in the world knows but I don't know... could it be that... I am actually... a person from heaven?"
The veins on Xiao Sanxiao's forehead twitched, and he sighed again: "Secondly, I would like to thank you, because you were very clever in resolving a disaster in Wushuang City and scared away a certain scary guy! So, for
To express my gratitude, I specially increased your wishes to three. Now, please tell me your wishes..."
"Twelve panics" smile three times!
According to legend, when he first appeared in the world, he already claimed to be an omnipotent person, and even announced to the world that as long as anyone could see him, he would fulfill "a wish" for that person.
No matter what they want, they can do it, but in the end, Xiao Sanxiao can always fulfill their wishes and push them into hell at the same time.
Once upon a time, there was such a person who wanted to dominate the world with poison...
Well, judging from this wish, this person is very stupid!
Dominating the world, competing for hegemony, and dominating the world are all considered normal...
Even if he wants to dominate the world... although it takes a lot of energy, it is still a man's dream!
But you are such a poisonous tyrant...
emmmmm……
I'm afraid only Kingsoft Internet Security and Computer Manager will express their praise!
Back to business!
This man desires to refine a poison that no one in the world can cure.
So he went to great lengths to meet Xiao Sanxiao and made this wish to him...
Well, there is always a sense of déjà vu that summons a dragon to make a wish...
Then, Smile Three Smiles really helped him refine this poison.
Unexpectedly, this poison is so strange that no one in the world can cure it...
Then, he himself was "accidentally" poisoned and died from the poison...
There are countless similar rumors in the world...
People make all kinds of wishes, but these wishes... are all the same, and the consequences are basically the same!
Xiao Sanxiao has lived for thousands of years... That is even more boring than Xu Fu...
Therefore, he works part-time as a courier, delivering food and checking the water meter on the spot at the same time!
…
Hao Jian pondered for a moment and said slowly: "Can I wish for anything?"
Xiao San smiled three times and said, "Of course! You can have any wish!"
Hao Jian smiled and said: "Okay. Tell me, what are your wishes?"
He smiled three times and was stunned, "Why are you asking me for your wish? I'm here to help you realize your wish! Regardless of magical skills, secrets, glory, wealth, status, as long as you ask for it..."
Hao Jian shook his head and insisted: "Those are too ordinary! I don't want them. My wish is to help you realize your wishes!"
Xiao Sanxiao: "..."
He is a little confused. He has lived for four thousand years, and this is the first time he has met such a weird person!
Trick him until he doesn’t know how to do it anymore...
When he learned about Wushuang City from the mirror, you can imagine the shock in his heart.
In particular, this guy even imitated his eyes so well that the great devil laughed so hard that the unfilial son actually believed him and recognized him as his father... and ran away!
Although it was a good thing that he ran away, Xiao Sanxiao always felt that...his shocking father had to express his feelings...
So, he brought up the "Hun Meng Heart Sutra" and came to Wushuang City in an illusion, and came to Hao Jian.
And when he saw Hao Jian with his own eyes, he felt even more horrified.
The person in front of you has more secrets than you think!
He knows his true identity, can recognize him at a glance and smile, and can even pretend to be himself to scare him away...
Xiao Sanxiao tested Hao Jian with "wish", but Hao Jian's answer surprised him even more!
So, Xiao Sanxiao decided not to act anymore and had a showdown!
He said slowly: "Okay! In that case, I have said it! The first wish is... I ask you, how did you recognize Xiao Jingtian? And how did you know the relationship between me and him?
Even the omniscient Jianghu Baixiao Kuangsheng doesn’t know these secrets!”
Hao Jian said with a smile: "How do you think I know, that's how I know."
Xiao Sanxiao: "..."
He suddenly realized that this guy was no ordinary slick guy!
Before Xiaosanxiao could speak again, Hao Jian continued: "Okay, I answered your question, and now I'll ask you another question! Isn't this fair?"
Xiaosanxiao said helplessly: "What do you want to know?"
Hao Jian pondered for a moment and said slowly: "Excuse me, what is the most painful way to hit someone?"
Xiaosanxiao looked confused, "You...that's what you're asking? I thought..."
"It's easy to talk about deep things, you, an old turtle, don't understand this, right? I'm afraid you will be embarrassed! Answer quickly!" Hao Jian said with a half-smile but not a smile.
Xiao Sanxiao could only say: "What hurts the most when you hit someone...of course it's with your fist!"
Hao Jian raised his index finger and shook it, "No! Doesn't it hurt if I use my feet? Doesn't it hurt if I use a stick? Old turtle, think about it again."
Xiaosanxiao said blankly: "That's true! Hitting someone with anything hurts... Then tell me, what is the answer?"
Hao Jian curled his lips and said: "It seems that I overestimated your intelligence! What is the most painful way to hit someone? The answer is..."
"Harder!"
Xiaosanxiao was dumbfounded. After living for four thousand years, he was ridiculed for his wisdom for the first time...
But he couldn't refute it yet, because this is really the truth!
But don’t you have to work hard...
"It doesn't matter, you ask again! I... I didn't know your method before. Now that I have experience, I will definitely be able to answer it!"
"Are you not convinced? It doesn't matter. I, Mr. Hao, specialize in treating all kinds of dissatisfaction! Excuse me, what do you pronounce as a point, a horizontal stroke, and a stroke?" Hao Jian rolled his eyes and said leisurely.
Xiao San smiled and said: "This is too simple! Read 'Guang'!"
Hao Jian nodded and continued: "If you add the word 'wood' to 'Guang', what does it mean?"
Xiao Sanxiao said confidently: "'Bed'!"
"Then... what about adding another 'wood'?"
Xiaosanxiao said without hesitation: "'Ma'! Young man, you are just a child..."
Hao Jian chuckled.
Hunting time!
"What about adding another 'wood'?"
Xiao Sanxiao: "???"
He was a little panicked! He made gestures with his right hand on the palm of his left hand for a while, and said helplessly: "I don't know, what are you talking about?"
Hao Jian methodically shook his sleeves and said proudly: "'Numb'!"
Xiaosan smiled and was stunned, and then he was almost angry to death, "You...what a problem you have!"
Smile three smiles: (╯‵□′)╯︵┻━┻
Hao Jian raised his head and said, "Look, look, you're in a hurry, you're in a hurry! Hahahahahaha..."
Xiao Sanxiao just felt that his old face could no longer hold his own, and he said angrily: "Young man, do you know that old people are as old as people, and young people are as young as people? If you ask another question, I won't believe you and you won't answer.
Come up!"
Hao Jian smiled and said: "Okay, okay, respecting the elderly and loving the young has been a virtue in China since ancient times! Then I will ask another question. If you can't answer it, don't blame me for not giving you a chance?"
He blew his beard with laughter and said with a glare: "Come here!"
"Okay!" Hao Jian shouted: "Listen up! I have a friend... called Chen Bao. I asked him, why are you called Chen Bao? He replied: 'Because when my parents gave birth to me,
, happened to see a cheetah.' So I asked him, I said, 'Do you have time today?' He said yes. I said, 'Then you come over and have a drink together?' He said, 'I won't go.'
.”
"What's the problem?" Xiao Sanxiao was confused.
"Here's the question! Let me ask you, why did he say 'not going' when he had time?" Hao Jian chuckled.
Xiao Sanxiao stroked his fingers and asked doubtfully: "His father won't let him?"
Hao Jian shook his head, "No."
"He doesn't want to drink himself?"
"no!"
"Then why?" Although Xiao Sanxiao was very reluctant, she just couldn't figure it out.
Hao Jian smiled and said: "Because today... kill the morning leopard!"
He smiled three times and was startled, "Kill...Chen Bao? Who killed him? You?"
Hao Jian smiled and said: "Sandstorm! Sandstorm...weather, sandstorm, black sandstorm!"
Xiaosanxiao had veins popping out on his forehead: "I'm riding a horse... I'll kill you if I'm riding a horse, believe it or not... What's your problem with this?"
Hao Jian squinted and smiled three times, "No matter how difficult the question is... then you still don't have an answer? I've always heard that you are wise, but now it seems... that the word 'wisdom' is pronounced incorrectly!"
"What's wrong?"
"You should read...weak! You are not wise, you are mentally retarded!"
Hao Jian said this.
…
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