Fatty Tao nodded, "Well, now that I've experienced and seen so much, I'm a little scared. I'm not the same person as Liu'er."
"What do I say? I don't lie. If people treat me well and are sincere to me, I will treat them better and be more sincere. Do you know that I used to be a timid, cowardly, and fearful student?"
, you said that I studied hard every day and got into a key high school. I was bullied by everyone in high school because I was honest. They asked me to do anything and I would not refuse."
"I always do their laundry. I live on one hundred and fifty dollars a month, and they all live on one hundred dollars a week. Those boarding students who stay with me always have their families come to see them.
People drove here with lots of things, but I didn’t have anything because the transportation there was inconvenient and the place was very remote. Even if it was express delivery, it would take my mother more than half an hour or even an hour to walk to the entrance of the village.
Pick up on the street.”
"I'm doing well in the village because I'm the only college student in the village, and everyone is very happy. My mother tells everyone that I've been admitted to college, and people in the village also spread the word.
The son of the Xiao Long family has been admitted to university. People in the village refer to universities, junior colleges and universities, even Tsinghua and Peking University, as universities."
"They all know that I have gone to college, so I have a lot of vanity. In fact, to be honest, it doesn't really count. I have no one and no connections. I passed the three-level examination, but I couldn't get into the undergraduate program.
I have scores hundreds of points higher than yours and went to the same university as you. You didn’t study in high school and played every day. You either relied on others or found connections to attend such a formal college. But I
But I worked hard step by step and endured hardships for ten years."
"After I went to junior college, I discovered that it is so difficult for undergraduates to survive in the outside world, let alone junior college students. There are several high-ranking cadres in our class. Their families are rich, and they only have one exam to take.
More than 100 points, 200 points, I was admitted to a key university. The family has money and connections. I really don’t know what to do. I lost confidence in life for a while. I want to continue to go to junior college and graduate from junior college.
I have to continue taking exams, complete my bachelor's degree, and then study for graduate school, master's degree, and doctorate. People in our family have planned everything very well for me, but they have ignored my own feelings. I don't know myself.
How much perseverance and confidence there is.”
"I just know that I felt like life was worse than death. After I went to college, I was still cowardly. Everyone bullied me. In the dormitory I was in before, they asked me to fetch water every day, buy them food, and give them food.
They did the laundry and asked me to buy everything they had in the dormitory without giving me any money. For example, toilet paper, hand sanitizer, and other random small items. I only had a few hundred yuan a month for living expenses, and their living expenses for a week were less than
I have more, but they look down on me."
"They bully me, and if I'm a little unhappy, they'll beat me up in a group. I always get beaten up, but I never fight back. In fact, I feel like I'm somewhat used to it."
"I worked as their son and nanny every day from that dormitory. Later, because one of the children, a good friend, was about to be admitted for the third time, they kicked me out of the dormitory and told me to get out. I had no choice.
, I could only go to the dormitory teacher by myself, and the dormitory teacher also looked down on me. I could see from his eyes that it was nonsense to say that everyone is equal. Why are people so unequal from birth?
Why do I have to be bullied and discriminated against? Why can I only go to a crappy junior college with three test scores? Why am I not as good as the school that others go to when I have toiled for so many years and eat, drink and have fun every day? Why are we the same human beings?
They always bully me."
Fatty Tao said this, a little excited. Then he took out a few beers from under the counter, opened them, handed one to me and Bolong, and drank it himself, "I always thought that patience would solve the problem, but I was wrong.
Sorry, my forbearance will only lead to them getting worse."
"I don't know if they have any humanity at all, and whether they still regard me as a human being. I was kicked out of the dormitory by them, and they asked me to fetch them water and wash their underwear and socks. These situations will not be known until you
It only improved after I came here.”
"You taught me what self-esteem is, taught me how to love myself, and taught me the dignity of a man. I experienced the first fight in my life with you. Only in your eyes can I feel that you have taken me seriously.
I am very touched to see him as a friend and as a brother."
"I have been working very hard to change myself. I started punching people in the mouth and I was shaking all over. Now even if I stab someone with a knife, I feel nothing. Do you know, what we have experienced in the past year is what I have experienced in my life before.
For more than 20 years, I have never dared to think about things. I transitioned from a student to a gangster in society. I entered such a large organization in a daze and watched this organization grow from being so prosperous at the beginning to becoming
I think about my current defeat sometimes when I can’t sleep, and I feel like I’m in a dream.”
"I witnessed with my own eyes scenes that could only be seen on TV before. I saw guns, and I saw all kinds of cruel methods in society. I saw the shocking scars on Xiaoqian's body. I may never be able to get rid of them for the rest of my life.
Already."
"I saw Shen Feng shoot and beat Zhao Tian until he could only sit in a wheelchair for the rest of his life. I saw the drugs. I saw countless blood stains. Every time I got money in my hand, I felt the weight of the money in my hand.
It's heavy and it comes so fast, but we fight it back every time. I saw with my own eyes that someone wanted to kill us. I saw with my own eyes that a knife was stabbed into my body. I witnessed too many things with my own eyes.
There are so many things that I never dared to think about, and I have witnessed many legends with my own eyes."
"What I have experienced, if I go back to our village and tell everyone, everyone will think that I am crazy. No one will believe it, but I have really experienced so much. I look at the Zhao Tian who once showed off his power, and the Liang Liang who once showed off his power.
The boss of Du is ruined for the rest of his life. I looked at Tiegang, who was joking and joking with us, and I was immediately sentenced to life imprisonment."
"I looked at Zhao Bo, and I didn't know what happened. He became the other person's person. I witnessed too many impossibilities with my own eyes. I witnessed too many incredible things with my own eyes. I thought, if I ever
One day, if I write a book about what I have experienced, will anyone read it? I suddenly feel like a frog at the bottom of a well. What I can see and touch is always only the touch that I can face.
Sky."
"Now Beitian is going to collapse. Although you don't say it, everyone knows that filial piety comes first. I know it's not good for me to say this now, but I have no choice but to say it. I don't want to be on this road.
I want to keep going. I want to leave this circle and live an ordinary life. I am really not suitable for these hustle and bustle. I am really afraid of such a life. That day when we were in the car, a bullet left my face.
The shot came in just ten centimeters away, and I even felt the bullet whizzing past my face."
"I wondered at the time if I was in a police drama. To be honest with you, life like this is a bit scary. A life of hanging my head on my belt every day is really not suitable for me."
"You are all my brothers. Apart from my parents, you are the only people who treat me sincerely in this life. You are also the only friends I have in this life. I can't let you go, but I really don't want to live like this anymore. I'm tired of this.
I am originally a child of a peasant family. My biggest wish now is to sleep peacefully. The life I envy most now is to be able to return to our village, farm, and take care of my filial parents.
Waiting to get married and have children, and live a quiet life with our family."
"I have been thinking about these words for a long time, but I don't know how to tell Brother Feng. To be honest, I am still the closest person to you. I want to hear your opinions and help me think about how I should talk to you.
Brother Feng said, don't ask me whether I have decided or not, I tell you, I have decided. I want to leave this circle, go home to farm, and honor my parents. I don't want to live such a life anymore."
"I really can't let you go. I don't want to leave, but I don't know what to do. I am the only child in our family, and all my parents' thoughts are on me. I am not suitable for this path, and I really am not.
It's suitable, I'm afraid, but I can't show it yet. Among those who take this path, the one who can stand at the highest position in the end, some of them have hands that are not stained with blood, and some of them don't have a bunch of enemies."
"Only they know how much sadness they have behind their glory, but how long can they continue to be proud? When we first came to Beitian, Beitian was so arrogant that there was no business place more popular than here in the entire county.
Now, we eat, drink and have fun all day long. If we go there occasionally, we will get a lot of money to spend. This random amount of money is sometimes the income of our entire family for a year. It is also a show of force when we go outside.
Yes, I used to dare not look at luxury goods, but now I want to buy them without looking at the price, but how long can such a life last?"
"I have seen too much, and I will never be able to stand at the level of Shen Feng or Li Feng in this life. To be precise, I can't even reach your level."
"I'm a timid person by nature. Every time after a fight or after doing something, I would be so scared that I couldn't sleep for several days. Sometimes I would have nightmares at night. I wouldn't say anything.
I always thought I could adjust these things well, but now I realize that I have no way to control them. I shouldn’t be on this road in the first place. I don’t want to continue walking here. I’m still here now.
I have some savings and my limbs are still intact, so I might as well go home to our place, start a small business, and live a peaceful life."
"I don't seek glory and wealth, only mediocrity." Fatty Tao said all this in one breath. After finishing speaking, he smiled at us, "I have a very clear positioning of myself. Can you see how my analysis goes?"
"After Fatty Tao finished speaking, he continued with a smile, "I'm not shrinking from the battle, it's just that I really can't help you here. I want to leave, but I really can't let you go, and I don't know how to get along with Feng.
Brother said"
The surroundings suddenly became very, very quiet. The three of us were silent, and no one spoke. It was so quiet for a long time. Bo Long slowly raised his head and looked at Fatty Tao, "Are you leaving?"
[ps: The twenty-third update is over. Happy birthday, daughter-in-law. I love you. I wish all lovers in the world to get married. Happy, happy, every day.]
