At eleven o'clock in the evening, He Youdong had closed her eyes long ago, and she was still not sleepy. There was an eight or nine-year-old boy in the next bed, probably because of a wound attack, and he kept screaming in pain, and his mother whispered in distress.
To comfort him, the alternating sounds of the two sounds gave people a headache. But He Youdong had the ability to lie on the bed motionless.
"He Youdong, He Youdong, are you asleep?" Her hands were waving on his closed eyelids.
He said impatiently: "I'm going to sleep, don't make any noise."
She curled her lips and thought, why did Feng Xue say that he was so gentle and so gentle? When had he ever given her a good look? At this moment, she could only lament that we were the same person but had different fates.
Seeing that she suddenly became quiet, He Youdong didn't believe that she would really listen to him, fearing that there was something fishy, so he secretly opened his eyes to take a look at her. Du Siqiu caught him, and she grinned slyly: "I
I know you're not asleep, come and talk to me, I'm bored to death."
He yawned and said absently: "Okay, okay, you say it and I listen."
"Okay, then what do you want to hear?"
"Whatever, say whatever you like."
"Sister, I don't know how to talk casually!" She became angry, and a fist suddenly fell on his shoulder.
He Youdong wailed, and now he was smarter. He picked out what she liked and said, "I know, I know, well, just tell me about your Kyoto and what fun things there are there. I will go to Japan to see it another day."
"This arrogant tone is as if Kyoto is located on a certain street next to his house.
"Of course, there are many fun places." She scratched her head and thought about it for a while, then said seriously: "If I have the opportunity to go to Kyoto, I would like to see the Kiyomizu Stage and Nanzenji Temple in Luodong, and the Nanzen Temple in Luobei.
Shisendo, and I must go to Arashiyama in Roshi. I go there twice in two seasons, to see the cherry blossoms in the spring and the red leaves in the winter. You know, I like the cherry blossoms the most. And there is more, and I must go there in the end.
Try the Japanese sake and kaiseki cuisine there. My dad likes drinking the most. I will bring him two bottles of Japanese sake and he will be very happy!" When she mentioned wine, she would always think of her father and herself.
The days of drinking with him.
She rambled on a lot in one breath, but He Youdong didn't seem to pay attention to her words at all. He closed his eyes and said lightly, "Yeah, really." Then he didn't say anything for a long time.
"Hey, are you listening?" Du Siqiu suspected that he had fallen asleep and started to have sweet dreams.
The little boy in the next bed suddenly stopped shouting and timidly interjected: "Auntie, I'm listening. Please tell me."
"Why, do you like Kyoto too?" She stood up happily and ran from He Youdong to the little boy.
He blinked his tearful eyes and replied, "No, I like all places in Japan."
"Okay, then you can't call me aunt. If you call me sister, I will tell you Japanese things."
The little boy nodded obediently.
He Youdong still closed his eyes tightly and did not participate in their conversation, but the corners of his mouth raised slightly where she could not see.
She leaned down and said: "Hello, my name is Du Siqiu, what is your name, and why do you like Japan?"
"Hello, Sister Du, my name is Yang Xiaozhe. I like Japan because my father is in Japan. I want to know more about Japan so that I can go there to find him in the future." He said word by word.
She listened silently, feeling a trace of affection in her heart. She tore off a piece of white paper, carefully wrote the words "Yang Xiaozhe" on it, and said cheerfully: "Hey, Yang Xiaozhe is already very much like a man. , my sister will teach you how to pronounce your name in Japanese, come on, follow it, Yang Xiaoyu."
Maybe he read it too fast, and Yang Xiaozhe couldn't learn it after hearing it several times, and he just produced some syllables that changed the key. Du Siqiu was so amused that he couldn't help laughing, and even he laughed out loud in embarrassment, forgetting his wound for a moment The little boy's mother was shocked when she came back from the bathroom and saw them laughing. She thanked Du Siqiu repeatedly for accompanying her son.
"Mom, Sister Du can speak Japanese."
"Really, is Miss Du majoring in Japanese?" Mother Yang was quite interested in this.
"No, I just took the N2 exam out of interest."
"That's pretty awesome. I'm thinking about finding a Japanese teacher for my little Zhe. I wonder if Miss Du is interested in giving it a try."
Du Siqiu was surprised to hear this, but as a standard office worker, she had to work during the day and had her own personal arrangements at night, so she had no extra time to work part-time, so she had to politely refuse.
The next morning, Du Siqiu went home to catch up on her sleep, and slept until three in the afternoon before taking the bus to the hospital to change shifts with He's mother. When she went, He's mother had already gone home.
She stopped at the door of the ward and saw a woman standing next to He Youdong's bed. She looked at her profile from a distance. Her face was as smooth and smooth as a sculpture. She had neat short brown hair. , with wheat-colored skin, a pointed chin touching the collar of an eggplant-red sweater, and a slight smile on the corner of her mouth. Du Siqiu recognized this woman at a glance. She was Huang Ying. Her photo was still hanging in He Youdong's bedroom. .
Through the door, she couldn't hear the content of their conversation, but from He Youdong's piercing eyes she could tell that it was probably a pleasant conversation. She leaned her head closer, and Huang Ying glanced over casually. Glancing at her, Du Siqiu suddenly felt guilty and walked back uncontrollably. Before the sweat on her forehead had time to evaporate, she felt depressed. She felt that her trip was in vain.
This weird feeling of loss asked me to the point: Du Siqiu, do you like He Youdong?
However, the voice was so ethereal that it was almost eerie, and it soon disappeared. If this was the case, she would have wanted to celebrate. But the consciousness of escaping from the responsibilities of marriage and family was still firmly entrenched in her mind, like So what, it is very easy to like someone. She can like someone casually, but when it comes to love, it is too far away.
The light outside the hospital was unexpectedly dazzling. She half-closed her eyes and stood quietly on the platform on the side of the road. The last bus had just started to leave. She thought, the next bus is so ethereal and so far away, I... Is it necessary to wait any longer?
"Excuse me, do you know He Youdong? Are you his girlfriend?" Huang Ying came behind her at some point. Her voice was slightly hoarse and her eyes were full of searching.
Du Siqiu looked at her beautiful face for a long time, nodded and said, "Yes." She simply didn't know what she was talking about.
She smiled and extended her right hand to her: "Hello, I am Huang Ying."
Du Siqiu also smiled: "I am Du Siqiu." She suddenly decided not to leave. He Youdong is such an idiot. He is such an idiot. Should she show mercy and save him?
So he hurriedly bid farewell to Huang Ying and walked back towards the hospital. She entered the ward without knowing it, with a genuine smile on her face. But at this moment, He Youdong looked at her steadily: "You
Tell Huang Ying that you are my girlfriend?"
Her smile froze in mid-air and she suddenly became speechless.
"Yes or no?" He asked again, this time his voice was cold.
She lowered her head and glanced at the text message he had just received: "Your girlfriend is very beautiful." The sender was Huang Ying.
Her head suddenly became confused, and she muttered: "Well, it's me, what's wrong?"
Who told you to say that? Can you stop making fun of other people's affairs?" His eyebrows were tangled.
"That's what we are."
"What it is, you clearly know that we are just in name only. I don't want you...you..."
Before he finished speaking, his lips were suddenly pecked in the next second, as soft as a dragonfly's water. He was caught off guard and looked at her with wide eyes.
"What about now, is it a little bit real?"
There was a suspicious blush on his face: "Do you know what you are doing?"
She suspected that she was really crazy, and her heart was in a mess. She tried to be calm on the surface and said: "I think I am saving a big fool who is obsessed with understanding. What do you think?"
He sneered: "Have I ever told you not to interfere in my affairs?"
"Then, just treat me as nosy." After she finished speaking, without waiting for him to answer, she walked away like the wind. She ran wildly on the street. I don't know how long it took, but the heat on her face and ears began to fade away.
Gradually it faded away. A brilliant conclusion came to my mind: Women's jealousy is really terrible!
The next day, she went to the hospital to take care of He Youdong as usual.
He kept staring at her, which made her feel scared. Fortunately, He Youxi came over and diverted He Youdong's attention, otherwise she was really worried that he would ask her for mental damages.
He Youxi didn't know the inside story and had always felt guilty about He Youdong's injury. Now he didn't dare to cause trouble at school, and he didn't talk back to him when he came to the hospital. He behaved like a little daughter-in-law. Du Siqiu thought it was funny and didn't tell her.
The truth is good, as it saves her from messing around. However, this is not a long-term solution. Her self-defeating thoughts are still rooted in her mind, and the problem will always exist.
After lunch, He Youdong fell into a comatose state again like a pig. Du Siqiu looked at his peaceful sleeping face and sighed: "People don't know, they thought you broke your head."
Sunlight began to sneak in quietly in the ward, stroking the huge leaves of the green potted plant on the window sill. Du Siqiu leaned against the corner and stretched out his fingers, gently stretching them. The snow-white woolen sweater and black cotton skirt gradually gained warmth. The plant's
The breath was covered by the strong smell of alcohol, making people restless. He Youxi stood beside her, looking out the window quietly.
"What are you thinking about?" Du Siqiu asked softly.
"I'm thinking, if my brother was knocked out of paralysis that night, would I have to feel guilty for the rest of my life?"
"Don't be stupid, it's not a good time now."
"But... I always feel sorry for him and my mother. In fact, I don't want to do those bad things in school. I also have a boy I like, and I don't want to ruin my image in his mind like this." She clenched her fists and said: "
But I can't control myself. Sometimes when I think of my father destroying our happy family for other women, betraying my mother for other women, and ruining my brother's marriage, I hate him so much..." She smiled slightly
He took a breath, gritted his teeth tightly, and seemed to be too heartbroken to speak the next words.
Du Siqiu stretched out his hand to caress her back, and quietly said after an unknown amount of time: "Me too, I used to hate my dad, I hated him for giving me to others on his own initiative, and I hated him for harming me and my mother.
My sister has been separated for so many years."
"What about now, do you still hate your father?"
She shook her head: "That was many years ago. I no longer hate him. Just like you Xixi, one day you will be like me and forgive your father. Hatred can never cut off the blood."
"But if he refuses to repent..."
"Even so, you shouldn't give up on yourself. If one day you don't care about the past, then what do you do now? Maybe you will find that this is just a stupid behavior that hurts yourself, and even hurts everyone who loves you.
.”
"Sister Qiuqiu, I understand." He Youxi reached out and touched the green leaves on the windowsill. The warmth of the sun remained on the back of her hand, and a relieved smile appeared on her young face.
Du Siqiu also smiled and turned around to see He Youdong and Yang Xiaozhe looking in her direction with great interest. Yang Xiaozhe most likely listened to her words as anecdotes. Children are not sensible.
Forget it, He Youdong, his expression is too complicated and difficult to understand. The content of the conversation involves his family's private matters, so it is really difficult for him to pretend to be indifferent.
After He Youxi left, she pretended to peel an apple for him to eat, while observing his face and saying: "He Youdong, can I ask you a question?"
"Um."
"What do you think about your father?" Logically speaking, his hatred for He's father should be deeper than that of He Youxi. Seeing his expression change slightly, she quickly added: "I'm just asking casually, but you don't answer.
That’s okay.”
"I don't know, I guess so. I was just busy feeling sad about other things at the time. When I got over it, I couldn't talk about whether I hated it or not."
"Yes, time can dilute everything."
In that era of poverty, she knew that she should not blame her father for not being able to pay the fine for violating family planning, nor should she blame him for not being able to raise a family of five. What she hated was that among the three children in the family, her father was the one who
She was chosen to be raised by her cousin. After investigation, it turned out that she was just complaining about her father's unfairness.
She actually had many happy memories when she lived with her cousin Xu Sumei. When she was young, Xu Sumei was determined not to get married, so she happened to adopt her cousin's "extra" daughter. Single women are often free and unrestrained,
Wandering everywhere from east to west, north and south, Du Siqiu always had somewhere to have fun with her.
However, the male companions around Xu Sumei also changed endlessly. She often went out with her lover in the evening, either drinking or dancing. Anyway, she would never stay at home watching TV. If she went home early one night
, then nine times out of ten she broke up with the man next to her, and when she came back she would only curse or cry bitterly. During the years when she lived with Xu Sumei, her nights were just her nights, and her body
There was no one around.
So that night, she had a high fever and collapsed, but no one noticed. She couldn't find the emergency medicine kit, and she couldn't make a phone call. She was so scared that she didn't dare to sleep, fearing that once she closed her eyes, she would never wake up again.
Coming.
Later, the doctor said that if Xu Sumei had sent the child here a little later, her brain might have been damaged.
The young Du Siqiu was lying on the bed and suddenly missed her mother. Her mother often scolded her and favored her brother, but she never made her feel lonely. As for her father, she wondered if he would occasionally miss her when she was not at home.
I remembered the existence of her little daughter.
It wasn't until he was fifteen years old that his brother Du Bolin died in an accidental drowning accident. Du Siyi was the only child left in the family. The parents then negotiated with her cousin with a smile on their faces and took her home. Like an animal, you can leave as soon as you let her go.
Just come.
It was her brother's departure that indirectly helped her return to the family. Therefore, she often felt an inexplicable debt to Du Bolin.
All those obscure pasts were gradually washed away in the long river of time. But she still couldn't help but walk in the dark night, looking for her mother everywhere. She still couldn't help but suddenly turn over and sit up at midnight, staring at the empty wall,
Be in a daze for a while.
In the past ten years, she has been insecure. She is extremely afraid of sparsely populated areas and is extremely afraid of rainy days. When it rains, she will be filled with panic.
Her notebook is full of memories of this past event. She used to use negative words to vent her dissatisfaction with her father, and she also often used thin words to enlighten herself: her father was completely out of control at the time, how could she secretly resent him for being ruthless?
Woolen cloth?
After saying these words, I feel much better. I really don’t blame anyone anymore.
But those "nights alone" had taken root deep in her heart and expanded and controlled her life arbitrarily. This chapter has been completed!