Volume Four, The Year of the Curtain, Chapter 47: To Die
There is no good news in the south, only bad news. Every once in a while, a list is sent back to the tribe from the battlefield. Each name on the list represents a dead deserted warrior.
The wild people have simple and resolute personalities, which are very close to the Tang people. No matter what difficulties they face, they can be silent, but not depressed. Even if the situation is harsh, women will occasionally hum songs while doing laundry and hunting.
As time goes by, the wars in the south become more and more cruel. The frequency of lists is being sent back is getting slower and slower, but the length is getting longer. The old, weak, women and children who stay in the tribe are no longer in the mood to sing, and the whole field is
It became quieter and more depressing, and the atmosphere became more and more depressing. Every night, you could hear a faint crying sound - no matter how strong a woman in the desert saw her son's name on the list, she could not help but feel sad.
One day, the deserted woman who was responsible for taking care of Ning Que and Sangsang finally saw her son's name on the list. She began to cry, and the neighboring women gathered together to comfort her.
Ning Que put down the heavy curtain of the tent, walked back to the bed and continued to feed Sangsang medicine. Sangsang took two sips and stopped, raised his head to look at him and said, "What's the point of hiding here? I'm going to die after all.
of."
"No need to feel guilty. The deserted people are like us, and they are not tolerant of the world. Even if they have not taken us in, the Xiling Temple and the Central Plains will not allow them to continue to live." Ning Que said.
Sangsang shook his head gently and said, "But if we don't come, they won't die so quickly."
After saying this, she spread her palms and looked at the black chess piece in her palm and began to daze. This chess piece was the only piece she fell in the last game of Lanke Temple.
More and more people died in the tribe, her illness became worse and worse, her tent became colder, and the surface of everything was covered with a light layer of frost. Only the black chess piece in her hand was still the same
Tenderness as usual.
Ning Que hugged her in his arms and said, "Don't worry. Even if the deserted people can't stand it, we can still go to the north and we can go to see the scenery of Rehai. The eldest brother said that although the sea was frozen, if
It can break through the ice and find a few peony fish. Old ox loves it and it should taste good."
Sangsang said, "You know I'm not worried about this."
Ning Que is silent.
Sangsang whispered: "I escaped from Lanke Temple to Xuankong Temple, escaped from the wasteland to Chaoyang City, and then escaped to the wasteland, and finally escaped here. I am really tired of escaping..."
Ning Que wanted to say something, but she stopped him.
Sangsang said: "In Chaoyang City, you said something to me. You said that the future and death are actually very similar. If it is already destined, then the troubles have no meaning. If it can be changed, then there is no need for us to worry.
It takes effort to change.”
Ning Que said, "This is what the teacher said."
Sangsang said: "The world is big. But there is really no place to let me live. We all know. The ending can't be changed, so why do we still have to worry? Death means there is no future, and when it cannot be changed,
Shouldn't we try to learn to accept it?"
Ning Que said with a smile: "This sentence is very good."
Sangsang lowered his head in a slight shame.
Ning Que said: "I didn't expect that my Sangsang now has the style of a lady."
Sangsang said, "I'm just a little maid."
Ning Que said: "Not mentioning that Grand Secretary Zeng Jing is your biological father, I just say that you are the eldest lady of the Pluto family. Who else in the world can have a more noble identity than you?"
Sangsang did not continue Ning Que's jokes, because she knew that he was trying to change the subject and said, "I don't want to continue hiding."
Ning Que was silent for a long time and asked, "Why? I feel uneasy in my conscience? Or do I feel that hiding like a mouse crossing the street? When I was a child, I told you that as long as I can survive, no matter how everyone shouted to beat me.
The rats crossing the street or the poisonous snakes that everyone fears, should be done."
Sangsang said: "I know I can't live for a long time. If that's the case, why do you have to be a rat or a poisonous snake? If this is a discontent, then that's right."
"Maybe we are destined to live so hard."
“What is destined?”
"Opportunity?"
"The teacher said, I was his opportunity, so what was my opportunity?"
"Of course your chance is me."
"Don't tell jokes. I don't know why, but I always feel that I should go to the south at this time."
"Go to the south and you will die."
"If you don't go, you will die."
“It makes sense.”
Ning Que is actually very clear that if Sangsang appeared on the battlefield in the southern wasteland at this time, the most likely thing that would not be death, but it may be more terrifying than death.
He said: "Everyone says living in a lively manner and dying alone. If you really want to die, there should be a ritual of glory and lively life. If you go to death, you may find a chance to live."
Seeing that he agreed to his opinion, Sangsang laughed happily.
Although I don’t know the specific situation on the southern battlefield, it can be clearly felt from the atmosphere of the deserted tribe that the situation facing the deserted people is getting more and more serious, and even the women in the tribe are already preparing leather weapons.
, you may go to the front line to join the battle at any time.
According to Ning Que's previous plan, he used the deserted tribe to block the Central Plains coalition for a period of time to see if Sangsang's condition could improve. Then he took Sangsang to the extreme northern cold domain, even if he went to the Rehai side to be a savage.
He could not be caught by the strong men of the Buddhist and Taoist sects. However, Sangsang's condition not only did not improve, but became more and more serious. Especially Sangsang was unwilling to continue to escape, so everything would be stopped.
After making the decision, I don’t know if it was because my spirit finally had a place to rest. Sangsang’s spirit became a little better. He no longer wanted to sleep as he had been a few days ago. The cold and cold breath in his body became more and more.
As she got heavier, she became a little appetite and had eaten most of the bowl of meat porridge before she let go.
Ning Que burned a large pot of hot water to take a bath for her. Sangsang sat in the big pot, and the cold air was everywhere on his body. The firewood under the pot continued to burn. Only by adding a fire talisman can the flame not be extinguished.
"This makes people think I'm going to stew you for a meal."
Ning Que rubbed her hair and said with a smile.
Sangsang smiled a little silly and said, "It's not delicious."
Ning Que said: "My Sangsang is the sweetest and delicious."
Sangsang said, "I didn't see you really eat me."
Ning Que said with a smile: "Who makes you always feel sick?"
Sangsang raised his head and looked at him with wide eyes and said seriously: "If you don't eat, you really can't eat it."
Ning Que pressed her head down and said, "You don't know that I don't like meat."
Sangsang said aggrievedly: "When I was a child, you were in Weicheng. All the meat was eaten by you. In Chang'an City, you like to be with Sister Shuizhuer. How can you tell that you don't like it?"
Ning Que was speechless, so he had to stop talking. He picked up a towel and wrapped her around the bed. Then he carefully wiped the water that had condensed into ice beads on her body, and took out the powder from Chen Jinji's house and put it on her face.
Apply evenly.
Sangsang looked at his little face that was gradually white in the mirror and sighed: "I used to feel that I was black, but later I became whiter when I was sick, and now I am black again. There is no fixed number of black and white, which is really troublesome."
Ning Que finished applying powder for her and began to draw her eyebrows again. He replied casually: "My Sangsang is black when you want to be black, and if you want to be white, you are really a little beauty who is always suitable for heavy makeup and light makeup."
Sangsang said: "Ning Que, your face is getting thicker and thicker now. If you tell such a huge lie, your expression will remain unchanged."
Ning Que looked at the clean little face in front of him, looked at her ink-like eyebrows and short hair like grass, lowered his head and kissed her forehead, and then kissed her cold lips.
He said, "You are beautiful."
Sangsang was a little embarrassed, but he looked at him bravely and kissed him back.
Ning Que smiled, put on her underwear, put on a fire talisman, put on a few thick cotton-lined clothes, whistled outside the tent, then looked at her quietly, and asked: "
Let's go now?"
Sangsang nodded and said, "Let's go."
Ning Que said, "Then let's go."
...
...
They left as soon as they said they could not leave, but they just stopped. Ning Que and Sangsang refused the fierce retention or even blocking of the deserted tribe, and drove the black carriage to the south.
——After a lot of hardships, they suddenly left, just like when they waited for the senior brother in Chaoyang City for a whole winter, and then they broke up when they met.
This behavior seems a bit ridiculous and almost a joke, but in fact it is a helpless choice under absolute predicament. Being free and easy is fake, and the foundation is extremely cold and despair. No matter how big the world is, there is no place to stay, and there is no direction to escape.
There is no end, so there is no meaning.
Sangsang, who was dying seriously, didn't want to escape anymore, so Ning Que stopped running. So they walked towards the battlefield in the south with a cold air. At the moment when they decided not to escape, he and
Only these only time she had in the world did she regain some meaning called freedom.
Escape these days is forced, and leaving is forced. Between the war between light and darkness, everything they do is forced to deal with. Only when they calmly die, will they take the initiative to do it?
The choice is made, because only the true representation of eternal death is higher than light and darkness.
Sangsang had seen his own ending and knew that he could not get rid of it, so she was very calm. Ning Que had figured out these things and saw through the truth. Or he had no hope for Sangsang's illness, so he no longer had any hope.
Fear and sadness began to calm down.
The big dark horse cannot calm down, and its hooves go out on grass, its nose smells the fragrance of wild flowers. It has a thick layer of animal skin pads on its buttocks, which cannot prevent the cold air in the carriage from invading. The legs have long been frozen and lost consciousness. It is very
It's panic.
The black carriage left the deserted tribe, and the thick dark clouds in the sky gradually moved, covering the deep spring wasteland, making the grass on the wilderness dim.
More than a dozen black crows flew south with the carriage. I wonder if the cold and cold air in Sangsang's body overflowed more and more severely, so that the temperature of the air became much lower and they became much quieter.
...
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(Take a good night's sleep yesterday, the biological clock was adjusted, I hope I can hold on for a longer time this time, it's best to keep going. It's just that writing during the day is still too easy to get sleepy, and there are updates at night. Please don't forget.
, There will be updates tomorrow, I wish you a happy weekend.) {Piaotian Wenxue www.PiaoTian.com Thank you for your support, your support is our greatest motivation}