Su Yan never abandons 【Flowers Bloom Slowly Return】Part.1
In October, the sun was still shining brightly in the imperial capital of Yaoguo, but thousands of miles away in the north of the Yangtze River, snow was blowing, and the cold wind howled, blowing off a tree of wintersweet.
"The weather is getting colder, Madam, it's time to put on some extra clothes. There aren't many houses around here and it's very desolate. If you catch a cold or something, it's hard to hire a doctor." The old nun in plain clothes put his coat under the wintersweet tree.
The woman's kind face showed a bit of a smile, "It will be the New Year in February. These days, I am thinking about going out for alms. If I can get some money for incense, I can buy some clothes for my wife."
.It has been four years in the blink of an eye. You see, the clothes that Madam brought when she came have faded."
The woman tightened her clothes and bowed slightly to thank the old nun. She was a little distracted when her cold fingertips ran across the embroidery on her clothes.
The base material of this shirt comes from the distant Pingzhou, and it is the toughest and densest. Unfortunately, it is dyed and then embroidered with patterns. The color will fade over time, just like the pearls of the old age, and the beauty of the past is no longer there.
"It looks like it's going to snow, and the yard doesn't need to be cleaned every day. Madam can go back to her room to rest while she's walking around, and I'll go cook some porridge and side dishes."
The old nun left, and only the taciturn woman was left in the huge courtyard. She looked desolate and felt empty in her heart. In fact, which day in the past few years has it not been like this? The sky is high and far away, without the worries of the worldly world.
, but there is no one who can warm my heart by my side. Loneliness is always inevitable, but since it is my own choice, I have to endure it even if it is uncomfortable.
If you had agreed to leave with him that year, would you have children around you now?
As if frightened by her absurd thoughts, the woman shook her head and smiled bitterly. Her graceful and beautiful face shocked the world, and another wintersweet that had not withstood the wind and frost fell gracefully from the branch on the cloth.
The lady who once walked in the palace and enjoyed the splendor and wealth is now accompanied by the ancient Buddha with green lanterns all day long. Who could have imagined such a gap? Although Suyan regretted that she was now alone without anyone, she did not regret it. When she learned that the emperor and the empress had children one after another
When a child is born, there is no one who is happiest than her.
"I heard that there is a Bodhisattva who sends children in Xuezhong Mountain in the north of the Yangtze River, which is extremely efficacious. However, it is located in a remote place and ordinary people cannot bear the cold there."
Four years ago, due to an unintentional remark while chatting with the concubines in the harem, Suyan chose to leave her hometown. Even though she knew that this would make Bai Qige sad, she still left without saying goodbye. She had been watching the couple grow from hatred to love and finally get to know each other.
Longfeng, who knew best how much Bai Qige wanted to have a child, and some things that troubled her, Ciyun Temple in Xuezhongshan, a remote place in Jiangbei, became her destination for the next four years.
After picking up fallen plum blossoms and stacking them under the tree, Suyan looked up at the vast sky and couldn't help but think of the man who always appeared in her heart.
She didn't know him well, she only knew his name, and knew that he was delicate and gentle under his seemingly cold appearance.
"Don't give up? The young master's name is really special. It makes people feel warm for no reason."
"Will you never leave me?"
"Um."
Who is an ordinary woman who doesn't long for a husband who will last her whole life? Suyan is no exception. She only understands that Yi Chenjing cannot tolerate anyone other than Bai Qige in her heart, so she wisely chooses to give in, but she doesn't want to...
The concession and indifference accidentally caught the eyes of another person.
I had only known him for two or three days at that time. At first, I always felt that this man was a little too cold. When he was more exposed, he faintly handed over a coat with body temperature, and then I realized that he was a meticulous and considerate person...
He is also a very courageous person.
In loneliness, past memories always come to mind. She tightened her collar, put down her snow-covered broom and stood in the courtyard. She clasped her palms together and took a breath of hot air. A white mist slowly rose.
"cold?"
His low voice echoed vaguely in her ears. It was when Yi Chenjing and Bai Qige went to conquer the Huoluohe Khanate, and she and Concubine Jing were chased by killers and were hiding in Tibet. He was the only one who noticed her trembling, and he silently asked
The shirt kept her away from the cold. After General Ou protected Concubine Jing and left the small village, Su Yan did not choose to go with them, but hid until Su Buqi was the only one left outside the deserted house.
"As expected, you didn't leave."
"Mr. Su, have you guessed it a long time ago?" Facing Su Buqi, who looked calm, Su Yan blushed slightly. She couldn't tell whether it was from shyness or embarrassment, "I want to meet His Highness and Sister Qi Ge, and I hope that Mr. Su will not bother you.
Take me with you..."
"You really want to see him that much?"
Su Yan still remembers Su Buqi's expression at that time. The delicate eyebrows on her delicate face were slightly furrowed, and a pair of pink and phoenix green eyes looked straight at her, without any hesitation at all, but there was a vague feeling of displeasure. Su Yan was originally
Being introverted and shy, it was natural for him to blush when a man stared at him like this. However, what could he do if he turned his head to avoid his gaze? He could still feel his gaze, so he realized that this man was really bold and disrespectful of etiquette.
Su Buqi didn't seem to intend to listen to her answer. After asking, he got on his horse, bowed slightly and extended his hand to her. Against the sunlight, he looked as beautiful as an ice sculpture.
"follow me."
She was ecstatic, blushed and held out her hands, then got on the horse and sat behind him with great expectation.
Come with me, he said this to her three times in total.
For the first time, she just regarded it as an invitation to ride on the same horse and didn't think much about it. She also didn't notice his gentle care that was cold on the outside and warm on the inside. She was filled with anxiety just for the person who had never had a crush on her, until one day.
Oh my god, a man with the same mysterious blue eyes as him came close to him and sighed half-jokingly.
"Mrs. Su is special to Buqi. He has never been so gentle to other women."
At that moment, I was shocked to realize that he only showed some expression when facing her. When it came to other people, he was always so indifferent, as if he couldn't hear her.
The cold wind became stronger again, and it looked like there was going to be a heavy snowfall. When she put her hand back to her side, she accidentally knocked something off her waist. This made Suyan panic, and she almost crouched down in the snow in a hurry.
After rummaging through the snow, a row of messy traces appeared on the smooth snow surface, a flash of green appeared in front of my eyes, and my nervous heart finally returned to my stomach.
When her only relative passed away, she was left with this jade pendant as a reminder. Looking at it in the dead of night always reminded her of her sister Surao who died tragically. Occasionally, she would also think of Su Buqi.
Is the jade pendant that belongs to her still hanging on his waist? Does he cherish it? Four years later, is he still as gentle to her as before? Or, because of her ruthless refusal, he is angry and has turned to someone else.
?
Suyan's mind was filled with sudden trivial thoughts. With a shake of her hand, the jade pendant she had just picked up fell back into the white snow, followed by two big drops of tears.
My heart aches when I think of him.
"I'll take you to the palace gate."
"Take care of yourself."
"I've been looking for you for a long time and just wanted to meet you."
"When I come back, I will take you out of the palace and marry you."
Every word he said was hidden in his heart, and every expression he expressed was etched in his eyes. I even remember that year outside Chaimen, in the coldness, he lowered his head close to his cheek, his breath and eyes were so close, as if she already belonged to him, already
You can throw yourself into the warm and safe arms at all costs.
Because of fear, I retreated timidly.
I'm afraid that this is just a wishful dream, and in the end it will be an empty joy and become absurd.
Light snow fell from the sky, and the deserted nunnery was silent and silent. Amidst the rolling dust, who knew that someone somewhere was weeping like rain, silently? It was like the figure who had been chasing someone all those years and lived desperately, and even though he had wronged himself, he wanted to make that person happy.
, confused and wasted, thinking about someone's tenderness and wanting to turn around again, there is no way out.
"The food is cooked, come in and drink some hot porridge to warm yourself up - oh, what's going on? Get up quickly, the snow is so cold, don't get sick!"
The old nun was holding the tray and wanted to ask Suyan to eat, but he saw the weak woman squatting in the snow in the ice and snow. In desperation, he dropped the tray and rushed forward to help her. Only then did he realize that Suyan had lost all strength from crying.
"Hey, don't blame me for talking too much. My wife always said that I would cut off my hair and become a nun. But how can you enter my pure Buddhist door before your world is over? According to this poor nun, if my wife wants that person to be safe and good in the world, it is better to clear up some troubles as soon as possible.
Go find him, success or failure, at least it is the result. Love is separated, and you can't find it. The suffering in life is the easiest way to bring out inner demons. Seeing my wife's health deteriorating, this poor nun really feels sorry for her!"
"Master, I've worked too hard again. Suyan just couldn't think about it for the moment." She smiled bravely, with tears still in the corners of her eyes. Her mood was no longer as turbulent as before. Suyan picked up the jade pendant and carefully hung it back on her waist, rubbing it gently to make her feel cold.
With his red fingers, his expression was a little dazed: "Master did not accept me as a disciple, but only asked me to lead the practice. I also understand that my six impure roots cannot enter Buddhism. But how can it be as simple as saying to find him? If Master
As I know, Su Yan is married before. Although he is unmarried, he is known as a wife, and he is a cleaner person than this snow. I..."
Su Yan sighed and stopped talking. Her increasingly thin body couldn't help but tremble slightly from the cold. Thinking of the gap between herself and Su Buqi, her heart froze.
One is an abandoned woman, one is like an elegant and elegant hermit; one is vulgar, one is comparable to a banished immortal from the world; one’s eyes are covered with dust and the true heart cannot be seen, and the other’s heart is like ice and snow, unstained by dust...
After all, I still feel like I'm not worthy of him.
Seeing that Su Yan was confused and unable to untie her knot, the old nun couldn't persuade her. He shook his head and sighed, then picked up the broken dishes and went to serve the meal again.
Who can persuade a person to be so paranoid? Suyan himself also understands that being so stubborn can easily make things difficult for others. In the past, if he encountered such a situation, he would always obey others, but this was the only case where he couldn't do it——
What she wants is a pair of people for the rest of her life, and what she wants is a life-and-death bond that will never leave her. If there are impurities in love, it will be worse than never seeing each other until the end of the world.
"I really can't imagine what kind of beauty is worthy of him." She was so obsessed with thinking that she couldn't help but murmur to herself what was in her heart. Suyan was startled by her clumsy behavior. She was stunned for a moment and then shook her head laughing at herself.
Who says she is an honest person? It is really rude to think about the love between children while living in a pure place of Buddhism.
The wind and snow got stronger, the whistling sound passed through the hair and brushed the earlobes, and the hula-la-la noise was so loud that nothing could be heard clearly. When Suyan wanted to enter the nunnery, she suddenly heard someone talking outside the courtyard. Thinking about the barren mountains and ridges, there shouldn't be any passers-by. Previously,
There was a time when a thief "visited" me, and I immediately became frightened. Then I thought about the helpless old nun in the room, and had to bravely walk a few steps forward, holding the broom tightly in my hand.
.
"Who is outside? This is Ciyun Nunnery. There is nothing valuable. If you don't want to be a Buddhist donor, please come back!"
At her shout, the noise outside the door actually stopped. After a while, a man and a horse were seen walking slowly to the door, their shabby cloaks covered with snowflakes.
"Are you a passerby?" Seeing that the man was standing at the door with no intention of offending, Suyan felt relieved and boldly said softly, "If you are a passerby, you can go into the nunnery to have a rest. It's windy and snowy outside, so wait until you stop before continuing on your way.
.”
The man let go of the horse's reins and stepped into the gate. After walking two or three steps, he suddenly stopped and suddenly spoke in the silence.
"Didn't you hear that just now? I mean - in my eyes, you are the only beauty."