"Seeing you makes me feel disgusted. Therefore, wherever I appear in the future, you will not be allowed to appear."
It doesn't hurt anymore. Sure enough, my heart doesn't hurt anymore.
He said such hurtful words, but he could actually accept them calmly.
She lowered her eyebrows and lowered her head, and Nuonuo responded: "Yes, I will keep this in mind."
Such a meek and even cowardly reply made him even more irritated, and his handsome face showed a very displeased look. Finally, he was no longer willing to say a word to her and turned around to leave.
He was finally gone, and my worried heart finally felt at peace.
The night was as cold as water, and her knees were so painful that she couldn't stand. After healing herself, she walked to a stone lamp nearby, gently held her stone arms, squatted down, rubbed her hands vigorously, and then pressed them on her painful and cold knees.
This leg disease is getting more and more serious and probably won't get better.
Whenever the pain was extreme, she would always use this method to ease the pain.
She is no longer the pampered daughter who can wail for a long time at the slightest pain. She is no longer the pampered concubine Li Fei, who summons the imperial doctor and has a room full of palace maids to serve her even if she feels any discomfort.
Now, she has already learned to be patient and how to lick the painful wounds.
After rubbing it for a long time, my knees finally became more comfortable. When I stood up again, I was shocked to find that he had not gone far, but was standing in the shadow three feet away. Although he could not see his face clearly, under the dim light of the pair
The gold-threaded dragon-patterned shoes made her kneel down again in fear.
"Your Majesty, I don't know that you are still here."
In the dark shadow, he did not speak.
She kept kneeling, and the pain in her knees, which she had finally relaxed, became severe again.
She kept kneeling with her eyebrows lowered and her eyes lowered. Her posture was as humble as the dust.
The figure in the darkness finally made some movement and gradually moved away.
When she got up from the ground, her standing was a little unsteady, but she did not dare to stay here for a moment longer. He had said that she was not allowed to appear anywhere where he appeared.
However, the entire palace belongs to him, so where can she go?
*
Shortly after the Queen's birthday banquet, news spread in the palace that Concubine Lu met the eldest princess in the imperial garden. Because the eldest princess naughtily broke one of Concubine Lu's hairpins, Concubine Lu and the eldest princess had a dispute.
Finally, Concubine Lu angrily gave the eldest princess an ear scrape.
How similar, just like back then.
The queen pulled out the dead prince after using her. Now, is she going to use the emperor's only living child to deal with the green concubine?
As expected, the emperor punished Concubine Lu. No matter how Concubine Lu begged for an explanation, the emperor refused to listen. Although he did not say Concubine Lu was thrown into the cold palace, he was demoted several levels in a row, almost to the point of being demoted to a slave.
Emperors have been ruthless since ancient times, and it took her five years to realize the true meaning of this sentence.
Green Fei, I don’t know how many years it will last.
At best, both she back then and the Green Concubine now were just concubines and his play pets.
Aunt Wu didn't know where she got the news. She said that when she was pregnant, she saw a caterpillar on a tree that scared her and caused her to fall down and abort the child. In fact, the caterpillar was raised by the princess. As for why it ran away for no reason.
When you come to her Tangli Palace, you won't know.
Aunt Wu looked very cautious, and asked her if she wanted to report it to the emperor and investigate the matter thoroughly. Although the caterpillar had feet, it was not easy to crawl from the princess's palace to Tangli Palace. It was trampled on by others on the way.
It turned into a pulp, not to mention that because she was very afraid of caterpillars, the trees in Tangli Palace were the most active in pest control.
Princess?
Sitting in the room, I subconsciously caressed my flat belly. Once upon a time, there was a living little life inside.
However, who would still remember that he almost passed away?
I'm afraid his father has long forgotten his existence.
After all, he was so young when he left, so small that he didn't even have a full body.
"No need, Nanny Wu."
This is how she answered Grandma Wu.
If we really need to conduct a thorough investigation, now is the time.
Five years ago, she had already tried it once, right? She didn't clamor and ask him to investigate the matter thoroughly, but he only gave her an answer that we would have another child.
What can she do in five years?
*
During the rainy season in the south, there were inevitably heavy rains in the north. She was lying on the bed, her knees hurting so much that she couldn't get up.
Aunt Wu was going to ask the imperial doctor, but she stopped her. She was so scared that she wrapped her legs in hot water and rubbed it on her knees.
After a long illness, she knew that her leg disease could not be cured, and the doctor's visit was in vain. Instead, she alarmed the queen, thinking that her previous delicate disease had relapsed.
She would never dare to mess with that person again.
Two hot eggs, rubbed and applied, the pain is lessened.
Aunt Wu sat by the bed, looked at her frowning slightly, and sighed deeply.
"My dear, why are you so troubled? You have to ask the imperial doctor to take a look at your leg problem. Otherwise, I'm afraid it will get worse day by day and you won't be able to get out of bed. What will you do?"
She smiled and said: "If it can't be cured, the imperial doctor will just prescribe some bitter medicine. My stomach and intestines are not good anymore, and I can't eat anything too bitter. I will waste precious medicinal materials in vain."
"Empress!"
"Mother Wu, go ahead and boil two hot eggs for me. These two are cold, so peel them off and keep them for me to eat at night."
"Empress..."
"Mother Wu, you don't know what it's like to be hungry. It's the biggest sin to waste food. Keep it."
There was another burst of pity in Nanny Wu's eyes.
The empress who once dismissed the delicacies of mountains and seas has suffered some inhumane things. Her body is broken, her intestines and stomach are broken, her body is covered with shocking wounds, and her knees are painful every time they touch cold water or are damp.
Even if a grain of rice falls to the ground, he will pick it up and eat it.
What kind of torture is it.
Thinking about it, I couldn't help but blush. Behind me, a little palace maid hurriedly came in and announced: "Mammy, the emperor is here."
Zixia, who was on the bed, also heard the announcement and got out of bed in a hurry.
Aunt Wu hurriedly stepped forward to help her.
But her knees were flat on the ground, and they softened from the pain. If it weren't for Aunt Wu holding her, she would have fallen to the ground.
When he came in, what he saw was her weakly attached to Mother Wu.
Dressed in white pajamas, no powder or make-up, her long hair was spread on her shoulders like ink. When she saw him, she hurriedly struggled out of Grandma Wu's arms and walked toward him with strange steps. She had not yet left.
When I came to him to say hello, I fell down unprepared.
He reached out to take it. This time, except for his hand, there was nothing else to rely on.
He thought she would hold his hand and fall into his arms, but he didn't expect her to reach out and grab it. There was nothing to grab, and she fell to the ground.
She was frightened and hurriedly adjusted her sitting position to a kneeling position, and said in a cowardly voice: "I, my concubine, pay your respects to the Emperor."
"Everyone, get out." He shouted coldly, his expression so cold that he almost drowned everyone.
The people in the room quickly left.
She was still kneeling on the ground.
"Are you so afraid of me?"
"..."
She didn't speak.
He lowered his head and looked down at her prostrate on the ground.
"What happened to your foot?"
That day in the garden, I saw her covering her knees with her hands. Looking at her today, it was clear that she had a problem with her feet and was unable to stand firmly.
She promised: "It doesn't matter, it's just that the weather is not good."
"Why don't you invite the imperial doctor to take a look!"
"I have a way to relieve it myself, so I don't want to work for the imperial doctor."
He frowned, stretched out his hand, put it in front of her, and ordered without hesitation: "Get up."
Three times, she refused his help three times. She would rather fall to the ground than touch his hand.
His displeasure was obvious.
She raised her head and looked at the large, generous hands in front of her.
Compared to five years ago, the calluses caused by holding pens all year round were thicker. She could remember the lines on his palms clearly. At that moment, perhaps it was her illusion, as if she had returned to many years ago.
She had just chosen to enter the palace and accidentally fell down in the imperial garden, and those warm palms broke into her life.
She raised her head. The sunshine that day was very good, and it cast a warm golden halo on his body. She was a little dazzled, and at that moment, her heart skipped a beat.
She raised her head. The weather was gloomy and rainy that day, and the warmth of that day could no longer be seen on his cold face. Those big palms were once the most familiar, but now they are the most unfamiliar.
She put her hand on his palm. The temperature in his palm was obviously hot, but it only made her feel cold to the bone, and she couldn't wait to escape.
These hands gave her the sky and the earth, but they also overturned her sky and her earth.
After using the strength of these hands to stand up, she immediately withdrew her hands and stood there submissively.
He walked over and was very close. There was a faint scent of dragon's birth on his body. It was his unique scent, but now it has become unfamiliar.
"Keep your head up."
he ordered.
She slowly raised her head, but did not dare to look directly at that face.
In my mind, this face is already so vague that I can't remember it.
Even though this face was right in front of her, she doubted whether it had ever played such an important role in her life.
"Look at me."
This is also a command.
She slowly raised her eyes and met his dark eyes, but her heart was surprisingly calm. There was no joy, no sadness, no anger, no hatred. All emotions were washed away. She stood there quietly, quietly.
Watch him as ordered.
Outside under the eaves, the rain could be heard pattering.
The wind blew by, making the flowers and trees in the courtyard rustle.
The room was so quiet that you could even hear the breathing of the two of them. No one spoke or looked away first.
After a long time, it really took a long time, so long that her neck was sore when she looked up, and he finally sighed deeply: "Now that he is out, what was before will be what it is now. I will not pursue the prince's affairs anymore.
Now, what do you want? Just tell the Ministry of Internal Affairs, and don’t eat the cold rice from the day before. Your nanny said that your stomach is not very good. If the food in the imperial kitchen is slightly greasy, you will have a stomachache. In this case
, next time I will ask the imperial kitchen to send some porridge and side dishes to recuperate my stomach, and then ask the imperial doctor to prescribe some prescriptions..."
She couldn't hear what he was saying. He was as tender and affectionate as he was many years ago.
He also cares about her diet, daily life and everything in detail. He knows her favorite colors, her favorite food, and her favorite operas.
, all acted according to her preferences.
Because he was too familiar, she couldn't afford such care, so she chose not to hear him. Her eyes were wandering, and her heart and ears were not on him at all.
As he was talking, he suddenly stopped speaking and said coldly: "I treat you very well, so you want to open a dyeing workshop?"
She slowly lowered her head and said, "Please, Your Majesty, please don't be nice to me."
She doesn't need it anymore.
He was startled, looking at the thin and cold figure. He didn't know what possessed him. Maybe it was wrong to let her out. That midnight, he shouldn't have missed her on a whim like that. He shouldn't have missed her because of it.
And it seemed that letting her out after issuing that imperial edict would only cause trouble for him.
However, he is not looking for trouble.
If he puts her in Tangli Palace and ignores her, where will he get all these troubles?
His footsteps should not wander here involuntarily.
His mouth should not involuntarily lead Eunuch Mo to inquire about her.
He shouldn't have felt a slight pain in his heart when he knew that she had a bad stomach, didn't ask for anything from the Ministry of Internal Affairs, wore old clothes, and ate cold food.
"Ha!" He sneered. He didn't know whether he was laughing at her overestimation or at his own pretentiousness.
In the end, he threw up his sleeves and left without stopping.
*
Summer, July, is Zixia’s favorite season.
Naturally, it was after entering the cold palace.
Because summer no longer has to endure the pain of cold vertebrae, and some unknown little flowers will grow in the abandoned courtyard of Leng Palace in summer, adding a bit of vitality to the gloomy Leng Palace.
There are two fruit trees in the cold palace. They grow among the deep grass. Their nutrients are absorbed by the weeds, and the wilted ones bear no fruit.
When she first entered, she was afraid that the grass would be crawling with snakes, insects, rats, and ants.
In the first year, she didn't even dare to go near the deserted yard.
She waited wholeheartedly for him to pick her up.
By the spring of the next year, she finally knew that the things she loved would pass away, and the things she feared had to be accepted.
Weeding, burning dead grass to fertilize, and raising fruit trees as her servants had done before.
In the third year, when she ate the first fruit she grew, she felt very calm.
The fourth year, the fifth year...
In the sixth year, she stood outside the cold palace, looking through the dilapidated palace gate at the garden that was once again overgrown with grass, looking at the two fruit trees she had cultivated, with a faint smile on her lips.
"Mother, stop looking, let's go."
Aunt Wu urged.
She turned around and smiled slightly: "Let's go."
It was a long journey back to Tangli Palace from Leng Palace.
Her feet were sore as she walked. There was light at one end and darkness at the other end of the long corridor. She fell from the light into the darkness. She struggled in pain, hesitated, and had no way out. She smoothed all the edges and corners along the way.
All the vigour, all the pride that once existed were hidden, and now only humility and cowardice remain.
Now, when I came out of the darkness and looked back, I realized that her footsteps were so heavy no matter when she left or when she came back.
The palace was heavily locked, and day after day, year after year, she circled around the palace like a working mule.
She wants to go home.
She hadn't seen her father in seven years, and her father, who was half-paralyzed in bed, was doing well now.
When she was little, her father would always put her high on his shoulders and ask her: "Zixia, what do you want to do when you grow up?"
"What does daddy want Zixia to do?"
"Daddy, daddy only wants Zixia to be happy, happy, and healthy all her life."
"Then Zixia will be happy, happy and healthy all her life."
In the courtyard full of roses, the innocent laughter lingered in her ears, but the person who carried her back then was now extremely difficult to even meet.
But the people who promised to be happy, healthy and happy are now here, waiting for the flowers to wither year after year.
*
When Brother Liu asked someone to come in with the news, Zixia was taking a nap. A palace maid carefully avoided people and secretly said a few words in Aunt Wu's ear.
It was very soft, but she still heard it.
"The former Minister of Rites is dying. With his last breath hanging in his throat, he said that he wanted to seek the emperor's grace and allow him to see Concubine Li before his death."
She lay on the bed, facing inward, tears falling down the bridge of her nose and soaking into the brocade pillow.
When Nanny Wu came in, she hesitated for a long time by the screen, as if she was considering whether to tell her the bad news.
After hesitating like this for a long time, the person on the bed turned over and opened his eyes slightly.
She stood up slowly and smiled Yingying at Nanny Wu who was standing by the screen: "Why are you standing here? I woke up after a restless sleep. Nanny Wu, go to the Ministry of Internal Affairs and receive two sets of red clothes.
, I want another set of jewelry, a tube of Daiqing, and some Bailizui fragrant powder and Qianrihong koudan."
"Empress!"
Aunt Wu looked at her puzzled.
She never bothered the Ministry of Internal Affairs. Even if the Ministry of Internal Affairs sent regular money, she would only keep the salary of the palace maids and eunuchs, and return the rest.
Why did I think of these today?
"I haven't dressed up for a long time. If you want to dress up today, go ahead."
No matter what, she cheered up and lived her life. Aunt Wu was still happy, but she was even more confused about whether she should tell her the news just now.
She was undoubtedly beautiful, but five years of poverty had brightened her originally plump figure. Now she was so thin that she couldn't hold up the red dress that Nanny Wu brought. It was so loose on her that she could only be held up by a belt.
The original oval face has now become an oval face. She no longer looks like she was young back then, and there is a faint wrinkle at the corner of her eyes.
But that couldn't stop her magnificence. After applying makeup, the exquisite beauty in the mirror, even Grandma Wu sighed with emotion: "Your Majesty is becoming more and more beautiful."
She just smiled: "Mother Wu's craftsmanship is as good as before. Mother Wu, please send a message to Eunuch Mo, saying that I would like to invite the emperor to come and sit down with me tonight."
Aunt Wu was startled for a moment, as if she understood something, but in the end she didn't say anything. She just nodded: "Yes, your Majesty!"
——Digression——
Tomorrow if possible, I will finish writing the side story of Concubine Li. As for some children who want to watch the side story of Jiang Nanzi, that will probably be after the main text is finished!